Chapter Sixteen
The journey back home passed in awkward silence, Lucy didn’t feel in a particularly talkative mood and found herself being quite short with Alex. Her head was spinning in confusion and she rued the day that she had found the ring, wishing for the bliss of ignorance.
They got back to the flat and set about unpacking their bags, an almost palpable atmosphere of tension brewing in the room. It was as if they were trying to avoid making eye contact with each other, making only brief conversation about menial things such as where the cleaner might have hidden the remote, or what they might eat for dinner. Lucy couldn’t shake the feeling that something was wrong. She couldn’t marry this concern with her knowledge about the engagement ring: it was as if something didn’t quite add up. She tried to tell herself not to worry, but deep within her bones an unshakeable feeling of foreboding brewed. Trying to put on a brave face, she offered to cook for him. She decided she would make his favourite, bangers and mash with onion gravy.
On the way to the local shop, she rang Claudia.
‘Any news?!’ Claudia answered on the first ring. ‘I’ve been waiting by the phone!’
‘Nothing,’ said Lucy. ‘I wish I’d never found that bloody ring.’
‘How strange! I was sure he would do it on holiday. Maybe he thinks that’s too obvious? That it wouldn’t be a big enough surprise?’ suggested Claudia.
‘Mmmm, maybe,’ said Lucy. ‘I just don’t know what to think.’
‘Everyone gets engaged on holiday, I’m sure he is planning something much more romantic,’ said Claudia. ‘I’ve got a friend who came home from work to find the flat filled with roses and her boyfriend down on one knee! That could be you!’
‘You never know!’ said Lucy, hoping that Claudia might be right.
‘Ah damn, I’ve got to go… Dan’s calling me and I’m late – we’re having dinner with his parents. And I haven’t even heard about the holiday yet…’ said Claudia.
‘I’m seeing you on Wednesday, don’t worry. I’ll fill you in on everything then,’ said Lucy.
‘Oh yes. Okay, bye! See you Wednesday!’ said Claudia as she hung up the phone.
The next day Alex and Lucy both returned to work, plunging straight back into the deep end. Lucy managed to find the time to share her holiday photos with Lettie and Simon, glossing over the low points and painting a fabulous picture of holiday bliss for them both. She didn’t want to disappoint their romantic notions of Lucy and Alex as the ideal couple and was hugely relieved that she hadn’t told them anything about finding the ring.
She had dinner with Claudia on Wednesday, having seen very little of Alex on Monday and Tuesday night; he had been working late again. She decided to voice her concerns to her oldest friend as they sat eating noodles out of cartons, Claudia’s speciality. She was unable to put her finger on exactly why she was feeling uneasy but she was desperate to talk through the situation to try and work out what was going on inside her head. She also hoped that Claudia might be able to shed some light on Alex’s increasingly withdrawn behaviour, his usual mood swings seemed to have got even worse. She thought perhaps Dan might have shared some insights that could explain his behaviour, but Claudia was unable to help. She shrugged it off, saying that all relationships went through good patches and bad patches, and that he was probably just really busy at work and unable to separate his work stress from his home life.
‘Anyway’, Claudia said, ‘things can’t be that bad between you two or he wouldn’t have bought you a bloody diamond ring! Would he?’
Lucy agreed, smiling at her friend and changing the subject to talk about work, laughing at Claudia’s hilarious stories. Lucy loved nothing more than listening to her chatter on and on, a perfect distraction from her thoughts, which she was finding it increasingly hard to escape from.
That weekend, Alex and Lucy were supposed to be going to stay with her cousin, Jo, and her husband Matt. Alex hadn’t met them yet, and they had tried so often to get a date in the diary to meet that Lucy had begun to feel embarrassed at the amount of times they had had to say no. At long last they had finally managed to pin down a date, and Jo had been emailing excitedly all week with plans about what they were going to do that weekend. Matt was a farm manager and they had been given a lovely cottage on the estate. Jo worked as a teaching assistant in a local school and had fully embraced life in the country, even owning her own pigs and chickens. She was dying to show them around and to get to know Alex at long last.
On Friday morning Lucy received a phone call from Alex. She assumed that he was calling to make a plan about what time train they were going to aim for, and pressed the green button saying, ‘Hi!’
‘Hi Luce, how are things?’ he asked.
‘Fine thanks, you? Good day?’ she replied.
‘Busy. Look, Lucy, I hate to say this but this weekend is not looking good for me. I think I’m going to have to pull out of going to your cousin’s.’
Lucy’s heart dropped to the floor. ‘What?’ she said. ‘We’ve had this in the diary for such a long time, you can’t pull out now. God, poor Jo…’
‘Lucy, it’s not exactly as if I am doing this on purpose,’ Alex said frostily. ‘I have a tough job, and sometimes I have to prioritize work over pleasure. You probably wouldn’t understand.’
‘Don’t patronize me, Alex, of course I understand. It’s just that I hate letting people down. Jo has been so excited about meeting you; we’ve had to put them off so many times before. She’s going to think something is wrong with us if we carry on like this.’
‘If you carry on like this then there might well be something wrong,’ Alex said acerbically.
‘I’m not trying to have a go, Alex. I’m just disappointed. I’m the one who is going to have to phone her and explain after all,’ complained Lucy. ‘And I was looking forward to spending the weekend with you too.’
‘We’ve just spent a whole week together, so there’s no need for you to use that as a reason.’
‘Look, arguing is not getting us anywhere. It’s fine. You stay in London and work, I’ll phone Jo and apologize that you won’t be able to make it.’
‘Fine,’ Alex said, then after a pause he added, ‘I’m sorry it’s worked out this way, but that’s life, I’m afraid.’
