AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“I know.” I struggled to breathe through the pounding inside my chest and reached down for the towel.
“Leave it.”
Neil’s voice was harder, different—a command really. I froze mid-step, flipping my eyes up so I could see his face and understand what he meant.
His long muscled arms were stretched out toward me. “Come here, beautiful,” he said softly. “Don’t think about anything that scares you right now. It’s only me…and you.”
I nodded at him but no words would come from my mouth. All I could do was take in the experience of the moment and try to hear what he was saying to me.
“I want to hold you, and be close, and know that nobody is going to come between us or try to take you away from me. I want you all to myself for once.” He tilted his head a little. “Do you understan
d?”
“I do,” I managed.
Neil kept his arms out, his eyes glittering at me in a way I’d never experienced from him before. He was demanding from me, sure, but that’s not what gave me pause. The feelings rushing through me were thrilling, but also very frightening at the same time. My emotions paralyzed me because I really understood, right then and there in that moment, the enormity of what I was doing. Giving myself over to another person. Giving myself to Neil.
It made me extremely vulnerable. Didn’t it?
I felt the warning kiss of fear brush over my heart, as clearly as a cold breeze that makes you rub your arms in an effort to ward off a shivering chill.
I didn’t know how I’d survive if I lost him now. If he stopped loving me, I wouldn’t be able to bear it. Or if I lost him to the war, which was a terrifying risk all on its own, and one he took every day he remained in active military service. I’d never make it out intact. Losing Neil would destroy me after this night.
“Don’t think about the bad things, Elaina. Let all that go and come to me. My beautiful Cherry Girl…come over here and let me love you.”
I went.
All I knew, is that I found my way into the strong arms that I never wanted to leave, that I would ache for once he returned to the army, and that held me so perfectly, I had to tamp down the urge for more tears.
Neil’s hard body and soft lips pressed into me, allowing me to feel a little of how it would be with us, teaching me what it meant to be granted the deepest wish of my heart—to be loved by Neil McManus.
And at the very same time, I was forced to recognize my most terrifying fears in regards to Neil.
I could lose him.
And it would kill me if that ever happened.
7
Neil was careful with me once he got me into his bed. He didn’t go beyond blistering kisses even though I would have let him. He kept us in check and his control was remarkable, because when he pressed against me I could feel how hard he was through his shorts. That it was Neil, and his erection I was feeling against my hip just made me hotter for him.
He hadn’t come to bed naked as I imagined he might have when I first stepped out of the bathroom and saw him waiting for me. No, he was covered, plus the sheet was now completely bunched up between us from my restless legs flailing around. Good thing for the layers and the self-control Neil possessed, because I surely had none.
When things got too heated he’d pull away and just look at me, stroking my cheek or my lips with a fingertip, waiting until we both cooled down.
I stared up at him in the dim light, my insides already a fluttering jumble to begin with, were now even more overwhelmed from his plundering kisses. I wondered where this was all going to lead with him.
Unable to keep still, I arched into him and then pressed my legs together to relieve some of the ache. “I—I need—Neil, I—”
“—I know exactly what you need, darlin’. I know what you need, just like I know what I want to do with you.”
He shifted his hips into me so I got a good feel of what was going on with his cock. He felt huge and this was not a surprise in any way. Neil was a big guy all over. I couldn’t keep my hands off him either. I splayed out my hands across his back as I met his thrust with my own body, feeling heated desire swarm me. I would have done anything he was willing to do and knew that any slowdown of passion would have to be all on him. I extended my hand down the front of his shorts, slowly putting my hand over the rock-hard ridge filling them up.
Neil hissed as my hand came to rest over his erection, his own hand covering mine instantly. “But we’re not doin’ any of it tonight,” he told me softly, gently taking my hand in his and moving them both to the side.
“We aren’t?”
“No. Not here and not like this.” He pressed his lips to the hollow of my throat and spoke against the skin there. “You’re too precious to me for some desperate shag in the middle of the night.” He moved up to my lips. “I won’t do that to you. It’ll be special when we make love. And we will.” He murmured against my lips. “Oh yeah, darlin’, we will, and it’ll be very…very…good when we do.”
