He cuts off as I stand. “Sorry. Need the loo,” I mutter urgently, aware of how rude I must appear. And he lets me out.
Waiting outside the airplane toilet, I try a different trick. Instead of trying to scrub all traces of my fantasy from my brain as usual, which obviously isn’t working, I subvert the image. Thistime, Anders is bending down and shovelling cowpats. I splatter his jeans with the stuff, even put some in his hair. But it doesn’t work. He’s still giving me his grin with the one-sided dimple and his eyes are still the blue of a summer sky.
I lock myself in the cubicle and peel down my knickers. I consider touching myself, but worry it will only feed the fervid daydreams, especially if my body links thoughts of Anders with sexual release. Instead, I clean myself up. Then, to ground myself, I inhale the synthetic freshness of airplane disinfectant with its undertones of the odour of mis-aimed urine. My ardour melts away like magic.
I flush and exit. When I arrive back at our seats, Anders stands to let me past. But as I slide past him, the plane gives a jolt. I stumble, my back hitting his front. His hands whip up and clamp around my upper arms to hold me steady but it’s too late. I sense the hard planes of his body behind me, the strength in his grip, the gruff whisper of his voice as he says, “Got ya.”
All I want to do is step back, to fold my body to follow the curves and dips of his. To feel every inch of his response. It takes all my self-discipline to walk forward, letting his hands drop away. I reach my seat, my body burning with even more lust than before. I’m losing my mind.
But something has changed. The plane is descending and I breathe out a sigh. We won’t be sitting here much longer. Soon, I’ll be able to put a little more distance between us.
The plane lands and as it rolls to a stop, Anders hauls our bags out of the overhead locker. He insists on carrying them off the plane, but I retrieve mine once we are onterra firma. I follow him through passport control and out to the taxi rank.
Scarlett is waiting for us as we arrive at the hotel. She looks taken aback as we roll in, flicking her gaze between the two of us, although she must have been expecting us. Weird.
Then I realise Anders is hovering behind me, his hand lying very gently on my lower back as he shepherds me into the building. And I’m wearing his sweater. It swamps me and is very clearly not mine. We look like a couple and that will never do.
I step away from my boss, away from that cradling hand. Scarlett hands me a room key and I bolt.
For once, I’m happy to deliver Anders into her clutches.
Anders Goes Off-Script
Cerium has a big announcement here. Tonight, at the opening night show, we are releasing a trailer for our upcoming game. Hopefully, it will garner a ton of interest and registrations for early access, bringing in much needed cash. It will be Piotr and Ginny’s job to keep that excitement going until the launch later this year. Meanwhile, Scarlett and Anders are schmoozing and pressing flesh as Cerium inches toward signing a distribution contract with a big game console company. If they can close that deal, there is a chance of more investment.
But before I do anything, I videocall Dana. “How is she?” I ask.
“Happy as Larry.” Dana turns the camera to show Max and Effie on the floor playing with a farm set. I remember Anders talking about growing up on a farm. Effie would love that. Then I think about having to explain to her what happens to all the animals and decide, maybe not.
“And you?” Dana turns the camera back.
“Missing her already, but…”
“You’ve got a hot young blood to jump instead?”
“Hush!” I urge. “Effie will hear. And no! I was going to say it’s going to be really busy. But I’ll call before bedtime every night.”
“Effie’s far too invested in that cow to pay us any attention,” Dana says, but I’m unconvinced. Effie salts everything away, waiting for the day she can interpret it. “But I’ll give you to her.”
The image bounces around until Effie’s serious face appears. There is no outward sign of joy and the first few minutes of our conversation is occupied with introductions to every animal in the farm set. Again, I’m grateful to Rob for explaining she still feels emotion it even if she’s not showing it. She’s communicating her love for me by sharing her passionate interest with me. It’s a different language for love, but it is love.
When she’s finished, I ask her, “What was the best thing about school today?”
Her face lights up, and I experience a small pang of jealousy. “We found dinosaur footprints!” she breathes. “Liam said his was the biggest, but everyone could see Priya’s was.”
I guess today my daughter has learned two valuable lessons and only one involves measurement.
We talk about school for a few minutes before Dana reappears.
“I love you to the moon and back,” I say before Dana shepherds both children off to bed.
Effie gives me a half smile. “Me too.” And it’s enough to make my heart explode. When those moments of affection are rare, you treasure them more.
After closing down the call, I collect my things and make my way to Anders’s room. I’ve booked him a suite with a lounge area which we can use as a private meeting room and staging post. Everyone is there. Scarlett frowns as she opens the door to me, her disapproval of my tardiness evident. But Anders looks up as I enter and asks, “How was Effie?”
It’s a sign of how well he knows me; he realises why I’m late. I’m also touched he remembers her and thinks to check on me, but I don’t want to show any of that. At work, I’m a professional, not a mother. “Fine,” I say in as unconcerned a tone as I can muster, as if I leave her overnight all the time.
“Good.” But my heart beats a little harder at his words. Not the fire of lust, but a gentle warmth at his thoughtfulness for a child he’s never met.
