I chuckled, putting a hand against my forehead.
“Honestly, Sophie isn’t bad. She just wanted Jackson to love her like he loved you. But it was never going to happen. I really thought when we drove to see you at Wren’s, he’d realize how insane it was that he didn’t reach out sooner . . . But he couldn’t make himself do it,” Julie admitted.
I looked down at the couch, picking at the fabric. “Why didn’t you approach me, either?” I was terrified of the answer. I knew why Jackson couldn’t make himself come to me, but why hadn’t Julie? She kept in contact with Wren this whole time, so why not me?
I could feel Julie staring at me, and when I raised my eyes to hers, she looked so fucking sorry.
“I thought maybe you hated me, too. You didn’t just ghost Jackson—you ghosted me, too. You have no idea how much that killed me, Addie. You were like my little sister for so long. If the little pieces I got from Wren were all I had of you, I was fine with it, as long as I knew you were safe. I knew you loved Jackson, but to be honest, I never knew . . . if you loved me, too.”
Another blow to the chest. I hurt Julie when she had never, not once, hurt me. What had I done? All of this was on my shoulders, not Jackson’s.
“Oh my god, of course I loved you, Julie. I love you like a sister. You’re like my fucking family,” I said through my tears.
“Good, you brat,” Julie said, her tears falling now, too. “And the only reason I didn’t want you and Jackson to do anything in high school was because I didn’t want things to blow up, and risk you losing our family. But it happened anyways.”
Our tears turned to laughter as we realized how dramatic we sounded. I had wasted ten years without her. Julie never wanted to lose me, but I had just up and left her. She wrapped me in a hug, and I squeezed her as tight as I had Wren and Mia. Julie was my family, too—even after all this time.
When she pulled away, she swiped at her cheeks. “Now, can I take you to Jackson? I told him he couldn’t have you until I talked to you first.”
My heart beat ferociously in my chest. “He wants to see me?”
Julie rolled her eyes and gave me a look that screamed,Are you kidding me?
“Come on,” she said, grabbing my hand. “He even let me take the truck.”
***
We drove to the restaurant, and Julie dropped me off in the back alley so I could walk through the back door to the kitchen. “Text me when you’re done. I’ll come get you guys.”
I turned to tell her to come in with me, that I didn’t have her number, and to ask, “Done with what?” But she winked at me and drove away before I could even open my mouth.
I let myself in through the back door, and Jackson was leaning against the dishwasher with his legs crossed at the ankles, just like that first day I ever laid eyes on him fourteen years ago. “About You” by The 1975 was playing through the speakers.
He stood up straighter, putting his phone in his back pocket. He looked amazing—refreshed, and happy. His dark hair was cut a little shorter, and he had on a simple black T-shirt with jeans.
“Um, hi,” I said.
“Hey,” he said with a smile, slowly walking toward me until I backed into the shelf of empty food containers. He put his hands on either side of me on the shelf, just like he had done back when we were freshman in high school. I set my hands back on the shelf, feeling his thumbs against my hands. I wanted to hike up my leg again, to reenact the memory.
He chuckled at me, clearly reading my mind before pressing a quick kiss to the side of my mouth. He stepped back and leaned against the counter behind him, crossing his arms against his chest.
“How’s the house?” he asked, surprising me.
My body was still pulsing from his closeness a second ago, and I had to shake my head to try to unjumble all my thoughts.
“What?” I asked.
Jackson laughed again. “The house, Addie. How is the house coming along?”
I put my hair behind my ears. “It’s finished. I just have to clean up the paint supplies.”
“So are you putting it on the market?” Jackson asked.
I was no longer playing games. I smiled at him and admitted, “I don’t have a plan. I’m still deciding what to do with my life.”
Jackson’s face lit up with a half-smile. “Yeah?”
I shrugged. “Yeah, I’m kinda waiting to see about this guy. I’ve had this insane crush on him since I was fourteen. It’s pretty pathetic, actually.” My face hurt from how hard I was smiling.
