Seeing him lying here in his wine-red dress shirt and jeans, his stocking feet making him look both sexy and unguarded, I feel a pull right in my middle. I answer it and crawl to him. But I don’t lie down. That’s just asking for trouble.
He smiles up at me and then looks past me at the sky. I glance up. The Valencia’s yard is edged with tall pine trees, but from this spot on the trampoline, the sky is an unbroken blue. That thick blue light of fall that can turn to gray with just a shift in the wind. It’s cooler out here than under the shelter of the patio, but I’m still not cold.
Which is good. Because if I were, the temptation to snuggle up to Luc might be more than I could handle.
But I try not to dwell on that. I just keep looking at the sky, letting my mind clear. A pair of geese pump their way across the endless blue with silent effort. Just those two. A mated-pair. They make me think of my parents. My lungs empty.
“You okay?” Luc asks.
I look down and find him watching me. “Yes,” I say truthfully. Sometimes I can think of them, and it’s peaceful. I’m not sad. Not angry. Not restless. Right now is one of those times. They don’t last long, but I’m grateful for them. “Just relaxing.”
“You could relax more—even sleep—if you’d lie down,” he says and then closes his eyes. It’s like a gift because now I can stare.
God, you are so beautiful.
“I’m good,” I say, softly, because right now, I am.
How long could we be friends? I mean, are we really friends? Friends might take care of each other when one is sick, but they don’t kiss. Not on the lips, anyway.
Luc’s lips are too gorgeous. Sensual. Just shy of full. The deep blush of passion fruit. Soft, yet unmistakably male. Friends don’t stare at each other’s lips. How long will I get to do this?
Will he still want to spend time with me at Christmas? Or after the kitchen is finished? I know he’s attracted. He knows I am too. How long until he gives up on me, knowing nothing can happen for years?
“Lie down, Millie,” Luc says with his eyes still closed. “I can’t sleep with you staring at me like that.”
I nearly bounce out of the trampoline. “How did you—” Then I swat him on the shoulder. “You were spying on me behind your eyelids.”
His laughter bounces us a little more. “I’m not sorry,” he says, mischief in his eyes.
I go to swat him again—if I’m being honest, just to touch him—but he captures my hand. “It’s mine now,” he says, is voice low and teasing. He doesn’t let go. And when I look back, the mischief is gone. “Lie down with me, Millie. Please.”
It’s thepleasethat does me in.
I lie on my side, facing him. He turns toward me, our hands linked between us. My heart hammers so hard, I’m afraid it’ll shake the trampoline.
“Just for a little while,” I whisper.
He nods. “Just for a little while.”
We stare at each other, neither one trying to hide it this time.
For a long moment, nothing else exists. Just him. Just me. We’re a thousand miles away from anyone else.
His throat moves as he swallows. “Millie. Tell me what you’re afraid of.”
I don’t want to have this conversation now. Not here. “What do you mean?”
Luc squeezes my hand. “Don’t play with me,” he says, and the way he says it, guilt congeals in my stomach like instant grits. “You know what I mean.”
I tuck my chin. “You’re right. I do.” I shake my head. “But I can’t explain it any better than I already have.”
His brow screws up into a frown. “Let me see if I’ve got it straight.” He’s been holding my hand with his left, but he swaps it now, covering it in his right so he can prop up on his elbow and peer down at me. “You’re attracted to me.” When he says this, he squeezes my hand, and a shower of invisible sparks soar up my arm and go off like Roman candles in my heart.
“Yes,” I manage, my mouth going dry.
“And I’m attracted to you.”
The Roman candles go forth and multiply.
