“And then you did that,” he says, his voice so soft it’s almost painful. “Touched my face.”
I shouldn’t. I shouldn’t be touching him. I start to pull away, but again, he captures my hand and keeps it right there.
“Not yet,” he whispers, and I can no longer breathe.
“Luc.” I say his name as if it’s a plea. A plea for him to understand.
“I know.”
“You don’t understand.”
“I do.” He sounds certain. The way he does when he talks about wood and granite. This is just another hard thing.
“But you don’t,” I whimper.
His thumb caresses the back of my hand. The one pressed to his beautiful face. How can a touch so small feel so wonderful?
“Tell me what I don’t understand,linda.”His voice is a warm purr.
My body is a wreck of fever and soreness, and I never want this night to end. Luc is here. I’m touching him. He’s touching me. I want him. He wants me. And it will never be better than this.
Then I know I am wrong because his left hand reaches across the distance between us, and he cups my cheek. I smile and I know he feels it. I move my right hand over his left hand at my right cheek, so now we are mirror images.
Now, it will never be better thanthis,and I need him to understand why.
“Luc, I want you, but I can’t sleep with you,” I whisper.
“Of course not,” he murmurs. “You still have a fever.”
I shake my head. “No, I mean I can’t sleep with you. Ever.”
I feel something run through him. Like a shock of stillness.
“Ever is a long time.” I hear him swallow. “Just me? Is it just me you can never sleep with?”
I remember him asking at the soccer game if it was because of his heritage. I shake my head, almost frantic.
“No. It’s anyone. I can’t sleep with anyone.”
Chapter Nineteen
LUC
I awakebefore dawn and know exactly where I am. Millie is tucked to me, my arm draped over her waist. Her bottom snug against me.
My balls are going to ache all day, and I don’t give a damn.
I learned a lot last night, and the most obvious is that lying next to Millie is not a great recipe for sleep.
Another is that when she’s delirious with fever, she says some crazy shit.
When she started talking about never being able to have sex, I got a little worried about her. But then she started shivering again, asked me to hold her, and fell asleep in my arms.
Night has faded into watery light, and it falls on Millie’s head, painting her deep red hair even darker. She sleeps still, but I can tell by her quick breathing and the heat she radiates that she still has fever. I’ve got to get both her and Emmett to a doctor.
Moving as slowly as possible, I lift my arm off her and reach into my pocket for my phone. It’s ten until six. Later than I usually wake up, but not bad considering last night and how little I slept. Still, it’s Wednesday, and I need to move.
All at once, the day’s concerns pepper me like a hailstorm. I set the phone down, encircle Millie again, and close my eyes. The world can wait for two more minutes while I hold her and sort out my Daily Three.
