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“I—I thought you were going to be—” She shook her head as if to clear it. “I never thought you’d come back here, or want me.”
“I can’t do anything else, and I don’t care about—what has happened in the past, other than you being hurt by it. I do want you. I want you, Georgina. Marry me. Be with me.”
Pulling back, he bore his eyes into her, willing her to agree. He watched her amber eyes turn sparkly with tears.
He could resolve himself to begging if he had to. He’d made her cry. “Please?” Bringing his forehead down to rest against hers, his arms wrapped around her back, pulling her close. “Marry me.”
“But why—” She struggled to sit up.
He helped her up to sitting. “No buts! I don’t want to talk about—”
She stopped him with her fingers pressing down on his lips. “Jeremy, you deserve someone better than I. Someone who can be a true wife and love you in a way I probably cannot.”
He kissed those sweet fingertips before replying. “Better? Better than you? There is no one better! And you don’t have to love me. You just have to put up with me. I’m not very lovable anyway, I don’t think.” Now that’s an encouraging thing to say to the girl of your dreams. You are such a profound arse!
He took her hand in his and pressed it against his cheek. “I s’pose I’m an idiot for saying such a thing to you. Asking a girl to marry you and then telling her you’re not lovable and won’t she please just say ‘yes’ anyway. It doesn’t really bolster my chances that you’ll accept me, does it? But I am a supreme idiot. I find that has been a common theme whenever I try to talk to you.”
Georgina frowned at him, the space between her eyebrows crinkling. “You’re no idiot, Jeremy.” She shook her head slowly, still with great somberness. “And why do you say you are not lovable?”
“Well, I am selfish and self-indulgent. I have not practiced much restraint in my life, and I am bound to slip up sooner or later. But I am willing to take that chance, and if I have you to help me, Georgina, I am sure I could be a better man than I have been.”
“Your assessment of yourself is an interesting one. I have not seen you behave selfishly or act indulgent ever. As for your lovability, I’m sure you’re wrong there, too, Jeremy.” Her eyes drifted to the side.
“I’d like very much to be wrong about that one,” he told her.
“And so you have come back,” she said.
Georgina moved her fingertips ever so slowly along his jaw, and it took all of his strength to keep still and not devour her with kisses. He wanted to kiss her again. He wanted her safely married to him and in bed where he could kiss her senseless and make love to her for hours and hours.
“As if I have a choice, Georgina. You have wound me into knots. I am so entangled in thoughts of you I could not find my way out if ever I desired.”
“Then why did you leave before?” She dropped her hand and her voice changed. She lifted her chin a bit, her eyes sparking. “You left right after Tom told you what happened to me. You didn’t want me then.”
Jeremy knew shame for his actions before. Georgina was no shrinking violet. Her memory worked just fine. She had not forgotten how he’d run out the night she’d told him.
“I am so profoundly sorry for leaving you then. I made the worst decision—I was a fool, I know. But you’re wrong. I did want you. Have always wanted you. My wanting you was never in question.” He swallowed deeply. “I was afraid—” Jeremy stopped himself and shook his head once. “No. I’ll not say another word until you agree to have me,” he said, feeling his jaw harden.
“Afraid of what, Jeremy?”
“You might not have me if you know the reason. You’ve been traumatized and much harm has been done you.” He reached forward and touched a fingertip to the scar beside her eye. “He did this to you.” He worded it as a statement, needing no confirmation. He knew the scar came from her attack.
Georgina’s eyes flickered away again, but she nodded her head, yes. Her throat pulsed as she swallowed. And he realized something else about her. She felt shame at what had been done to her. It’s not your fault, sweet Georgina. It killed Jeremy to know she suffered still, and he wanted nothing more than to erase it from her mind.
“And every time you see the mark, you will remember what was done.” Her voice trembled. “I cannot bear that, Jeremy.”
“No, Georgina.” He pressed his lips to the scar. “I will not. When I see it I will be reminded of your bravery, and be so grateful that you survived such a thing. No shame in that, sweet Georgina. None of what happened to you was your fault.”
“Jeremy, it is my visible scar, but I fear there are more, worse ones in here—” She clutched at her heart. “And here as well.” She touched her forehead.
“Then let me be the one to help you put them away. Let me comfort and protect you. I want to so badly. And none of what happened in your past alters my affection for you. Know that, Georgina. My affections for you are unchanging in spite of that knowledge. I only wish to keep you from hurt.”
“Then why did you leave before, Jeremy?” she fired back.
Georgina wasn’t going to take him without an explanation. He realized she was demanding to hear the “why” behind his hasty departure of a month ago. And he was going to have to tell her. Damn me.
“You will promise to marry me first. I can be stubborn, too!” Jeremy declared, supposing he might as well go in up to his neck. He set his jaw and leaned forward quickly, figuring if he had to impel her, he would use every wile he could muster to further his cause. He took her sweet lips agai
n and not very gently this time. This time he gave her a kiss of claiming.
