“Julian, you should have been there. It was the coolest thing I’ve ever seen in my entire life,” I gushed. “He was so calm and in control and methodical. It was insane!”
Julian looked over at Alex. “When I do my job, I just mix drinks.”
“And I just write meaningless articles,” I added.
Suddenly Alex looked coy. His cheeks seemed to flush a little. “Thanks, guys.” He held his drink up and I clanked his glass in toast.
“So . . .” Julian did his bar lean again. The one he was becoming quite famous for. “I didn’t know you guys were into this.”
“Into what?” I asked.
“Swinging,” he stated.
“Swinging from what?” Alex took a sip of his drink and looked confused. So was I.
“Uh . . .” Julian looked from Alex to me and back again. “From each other.”
Alex tsked. “What does that mean? How do you swing from each other? Is this a new workout? I can never keep up with them. It’s yogalates one day and stretchaerobics the next.”
Julian’s eyes widened and then he shook his head. “You guys have no idea where you are, do you?”
“We’re on a yacht,” I said flatly. “We’re here for dinner, compliments of the hotel.”
Julian smiled at us conspiratorially. “Guys, this is the annual swingers’ convention. They come here once a year and book out a yacht. I work the bar, really great tips I might add.”
Alex shook his head. He still wasn’t computing. My brain, however, was starting to get it.
“NO!” I gasped under my breath. “It can’t be. We were just talking to such a nice couple over there.”
Julian raised his eyebrows and shook his head, as if in disbelief.
“They were nice,” I continued. “And they can’t be swingers. He’s a surgeon and she’s a stay-at-home mom. Stay-at-home moms don’t swing!”
“You think?” Julian looked very amused now. “Why don’t you ask them?” He looked past me and I turned. I looked over at the couple again, and suddenly, it all became very, very crystal clear. Paul and Bethany were smiling at us. But this time the smile didn’t look so friendly.
“Shit!” I turned back to the bar as quickly as I possibly could. “This is a swingers’ convention. We are on the wrong yacht!” I whispered over at Alex, who still seemed to be totally oblivious to what I was saying.
“Let me paint a very clear picture for you then, Alex,” I said, leaning over to him and gently placing my hand over his for added emphasis. “The people who have come on this cruise are swingers. Not from trees, or ropes or even on swings—unless they’re sex swings—they have sex with each other. Partner-swap. Drop their keys in a bowl at the door.”
Alex’s face still looked blank, still processing and absorbing this information. I tapped his hand, hoping the movement would help him along. And then he laughed. Shook his head and smiled at me.
“Nonsense,” he said, “that couple over there is too old fo—” He turned and looked at them, and then as fast as I’ve ever seen anyone move their head, his eyes were back on me. Wide as saucers. “She has her breast out.” He reached for his drink and sipped it.
“She’s not the only one,” Julian chuckled. “Look around.”
I closed my eyes tightly and shook my head. “I don’t know if I want to look around.”
“Well, you’re going to see it at some point,” Julian said with a laugh in his voice.
Alex and I stared at each other and then both slowly turned our heads around.Yup, things were really starting to become quite crystal clear now.The woman wearing nothing but her lingerie at the edge of the pool seemed to help clarify things for me. The naked couple in the pool that she and some others were now watching seemed like a dead giveaway too.
“Alex, we have to get out of here,” I said.
Alex didn’t speak, he just nodded.
“Bye, Julian,” I said, as the two of us quickly made a dash for the other side of the deck where the exit was. But just as we were almost there, we felt the yacht move.
“Oh no.” I started to run down the stairs and arrived at the bottom just in time to see the yacht pulling away from the pier.
