Well, that was a total lie. I know that, now. Because, when you’re not with me, I cannot breathe. I wait patiently and I try to be calm, just like I told you to be, but it doesn’t work. When you’re not here with me, I feel like I’m drowning. I go through my day trying to gasp for air that never comes. It’s only when I’m finally with you, when we can sneak away together, that I can breathe again. It’s only in those quiet moments with you—in the willow, under the stage, in the cove—that I get to breathe again. So, like swimming under water, I take as many deep breaths as I can with you, because I never know when I’m going to be able to come back up to the surface again . . .
You, me, forever.
I slowly lowered the letter to the table again.
“That’s . . . that’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever heard.” Ash was wiping away a flood of tears now. “I had no idea Gran was so in love with someone else.”
“It’s terrible they couldn’t be together,” Emelia said, and then she looked down at Ash. “In a way, that could be us. If we had been born in another time, or in another country, or to another family. Can you imagine that? Not being able to be together?” She laid her hand on Ash’s shoulder. “I mean, how dare someone tell you who you’re allowed to love? Especially the government,” she continued.
“This story has to be told.” Ash stood up suddenly. “Gran would have wanted that. It was basically her final wish.”
I looked up at Mike; he seemed like he was somewhere else, that he wasn’t present in this room. His body was here, but his mind was elsewhere. And then, without a word, he reached down and started gathering up all the letters and the diary from the table.
“What are you doing?” I asked, as he walked towards the door.
“Some investigating,” he said, exiting the room.
“Shame, this seems to really have affected him,” Emelia said, when he was out of earshot.
“They were really close,” Ash said.
“Becca!” Mike called out loudly, sticking his head back around the door.
“Yes?” I jumped.
“You better not go anywhere.”
“I won’t,” I said.
“Don’t worry. She can hang with us. We’ll keep an eye on her,” Ash said.
He nodded, and his head disappeared again.
“Hey!” Ash said. Her whole tone and demeanor had changed, now. “Didn’t you guys meet for the first time on a fence, too?”
“What?” My jaw dropped open and I looked at her.
She smiled at me—a strange smile, as if it held a secret—and then she looked over at her partner Emelia and the two exchanged some kind of alook.
My heart started thumping a soundtrack in my chest, and the blood rushing past my ears created an orchestra of accompanying sounds, until I had a full-blown concerto playing in my head, making me feel rather dizzy.
