“You know what’s just around the corner?” Noah said to me, as he slipped the key into the ignition.
“What?”
“The building where you had the accident.”
“Oh.” There was a pause. A moment of epic silence in the car.
“Do you want to go and see it, in case some of your memories come back? I mean, but if it will be too traumatic . . .”
“No! I’d actually like that. I want to see where it happened.”
Moments later we pulled up to the building. It was another cool-looking building, much like Sindi’s.
“Do you recognize anything?” Noah asked.
“No.” I walked towards the entrance and Noah followed. “Nothing about this is even vaguely familiar.” I stopped to look at the façade, hoping that something would come back to me. And then I scanned the list of businesses and offices on the wall outside.
A film company. A talent management agency. Bookstore. Gallery. An interiors shop. Clothing store. A lawyer. An investment firm. A cake shop. Even a pharmacy and hairdresser, and so,somany more. The list went on forever, and of course there were all the apartments and restaurants too. I could have been here for any reason. I could work here. I could live here. I could have been here because I worked in film. I could have been having my hair done.
I walked towards the elevator. It still had red-and-white danger tape cordoning it off. The doors were open, the shaft was empty and a huge orange cone told people not to go anywhere near it.
“This is it!” I said.
“Yes.” Noah came up behind me, speaking to me over my shoulder. He was close. If I took a step back, I would be able to touch his chest.
“Is anything coming to you?”
I shivered and clutched my arms to my body as a cold sensation clawed its way over my skin and made the hairs on my arms stand up. “No. Just a feeling.” I clutched myself tighter and the feeling intensified. “I . . . I don’t like it,” I whispered. “It frightens me.”
I felt a hand on my shoulder. Firm. Big. Reassuring. I didn’t realize until that moment how much I’d missed the feel of his hand. It had been a day since I’d felt it.
“Let’s go. It’s not worth it.” He turned my body away from the elevator and then looped his arm through mine and walked us out of the building together. People looking at us might think we were great friends. Or even husband and wife. That’s how comfortable I felt with Noah. How comfortable his arm felt looped through mine like that.
When we got home, I changed into one of the bikinis that Sindi had given me. She’d bought some for a swimwear shoot, and they’d never been used, so I was going to use them as underwear. I was feeling so much better in my new clothes, and certainly with my new undies. We’d fallen into anotherGame of Thronesmarathon and, this time, we talked the entire way through. We kept having to pause the TV to finish what we were saying to each other. But when I started feeling a pain in my abdomen, went to the bathroom and came back out, I was unable to sit down again. Something Noah seemed to notice straight away.
“What?” He looked up at me.
“Um . . .” I started, and then stopped. This was not an easy conversation to have.
“Soooo,” I stretched the word out, buying myself time to think.
“Yeeees.” He imitated me with an amused smile, as if I was starting some sort of game.
“The thing is . . .” I hesitated.
“Yessss.” He stretched out the “s” sound like a snake might do.
“I need tampons!” I blurted out.
Noah’s eyes widened. “Oh. OH! Aaaahhh!”
“Overshare. I know. Awkward. But I need them,” I gushed.
“Of course.” Noah stood up.
“Or pads. Or tampons, or pads, or those little cups, or . . .” I scanned my mind again, looking into the nothingness once more. “I don’t know, actually. I don’t know what I use.” I shrugged.
Weird thought, that. You lose your memory and can’t remember what kind of sanitary wear you use. I bet no one had ever thought of that. Those tiny things that go with losing your memory. I wondered what other small things I might encounter along the way like this.
