“It means that at some stage in your life you had surgery to repair a broken back and shoulder. You have no recollection of that?”
I shook my head and suddenly tears welled up in my eyes. I was feeling an emotion that I couldn’t quite name and connect to, and yet it was strong. So strong that it was strangling my throat from the inside.
“I’ll give you something to help you relax.” She leaned in and pushed a syringe into my IV and a warm feeling washed over me.
“Hello, darhling.” Another familiar face came in. It was Ntethelelo, the cheerful nurse who’d attended to me earlier. “How are you feeling?” She walked up to my bed and fluffed my pillow, repositioning my head on it. “This is five-star accommodation here. We want everyone to be as comfortable as possible.”
“Thanks,” I said, looking up at her.
“I’ll be back later. You’re in good hands,” the doctor said, and then left.
“Excellent hands,” Ntethelelo whispered to me. “Right,” she chirped, pulling a machine closer. “Time to take your blood pressure and your oxygen saturation.” She attached a cuff to my arm and a device to my finger and began taking the readings. I glanced over at the window. I was clearly on a higher floor than before.
“One hundred per cent!” she declared when she was done. “I told you you were going to be alright.”
Someone else then came in and put a tray of food on my table. I looked at it and my stomach lurched. I pushed the table away from me, and Ntethelelo glanced down at the food as if she were taking a mental note of it.
“Right, just press the button if you need me.” She pointed to a button within my reach. “And try and get some rest.”
“Wait,” I called after her. “Noah—do you know if he’s here?”
“Sorry, who?”
“Noah, the paramedic who brought me here, and then before we went into the elevator, he was there with me.”
“Oh, Noah. He brought you in, but I didn’t see him before we went to X-ray.”
“You did, he came up and helped me. Told me to take deep breaths and relax.”
She looked at me sympathetically. “That was me, darling. I was the one who told you to breathe.”
“No, it was him. I saw him in the corridor. He was on his phone and then he was by my side and he took my hand and, and . . .” I stopped talking and swallowed.Had I imagined him?Had I imagined seeing him in the corridor? Hearing him? What else had I imagined about him?
“It was just me there,” Ntethelelo said, with a smile I couldn’t interpret. “Get some rest.” And then she turned, walked out of the room, closed the door behind her, and I was alone, again.
CHAPTER 4
I was surprised to find two policemen in my room when I woke up. A doctor with long red hair who I’d never seen before was also there. I shot up in my bed and pulled the covers towards me.
“It’s okay, you’re not in any trouble,” the doctor said, clearly reading my mind—or whatever mind I had left. It was still blank. I felt it the second I woke up.
“I’m Dr. Cohen, I’m a psychiatrist here, and these two gentlemen are here to see if we can help you find out who you are. Do you still not remember your name?”
“No,” I said, glancing from her to the policemen and back again.
I heard a noise at the window, so loud that we all turned to look. A beautiful white dove on the windowsill was pecking on the glass with its beak.Did it want to come in?I could think of nothing worse than being “in” right now and I wanted to yell at it that it should fly the hell away.
I turned back and saw Dr. Cohen write something down in her file. So many files. So many notes. I wished I knew what was in them all. It seemed to me that everyone knew more about me than I did.
“And you still don’t remember why you’re in the hospital?” the doctor asked.
“They said I was in an elevator accident.”
“And is there anything you can remember about who you are, or your life?”
“No.”
“I’m sorry. I’m sure you’re feeling very frustrated and confused right now.”
