Madeline gazed at him in horror. “No, that’s not necessary. Hilary, tell Lady Thurston I will be right there.”
She glanced back at Adam and saw his disappointment by the rise and fall of his chest. Hilary left the kitchen, and Madeline glared hotly at Adam. “Just what did you intend to tell her?”
He sank back into his chair. “Nothing, Madeline. I was only going to tell her you were having tea. She wouldn’t have complained about it tome.”
Madeline sighed with relief. She sat down.
“Are you worried I’m going to tell her the truth before you think she’s ready?” Adam asked. “I have to admit, I’m tempted.”
“Please, don’t. Wait a little longer, until she’s on her feet.”
“Fine. I will wait until then.” His gaze lifted slowly to meet hers. “But what about after that? If you return to Yorkshire with her, will you stay there?”
What was he getting at?
“Adam, I thought we weren’t going to talk about this again.”
“Why not? Have you no longings, Madeline? No desires? We’ve been ignoring each other for days now, and I’ve been forced to follow your lead, closing myself off to what I really feel and putting on a damn show for the rest of the world. What is it? Are you truly dead inside, or can I be optimistic and flatter myself by thinking that maybe someday, you might care for me just a little?”
An unwelcome tension wrapped tightly around Madeline. “There is no point in hoping. It only sets us up for disappointment.”
“Is that a fact? Well, I can’t help hoping. Nor can I stop wanting you.”
She couldn’t believe he was being so open after six days of complete silence.
He held the tea strainer over her cup and poured, then shoved her cup across the table toward her.
Madeline kept her eyes on her tea. Her heart was racing inside her chest like a runaway stallion. No one before Adam had ever spoken so candidly to her before, with such intense, pent-up anger. Nor had anyone ever told her that they actuallywantedher.
Certainly not when Diana was within their grasp.
“Diana might be an invalid,” she said, groping for words. “She might never walk again.”
“She willnotbe an invalid. Those are excuses. I took you for more of an optimist than that.”
Still Madeline would not look up. “I just want to be prepared for the worst.”
He sat down. “Fine. I accept that. But if that’s the worst, and you go back to Yorkshire with her and see that she is settled in your family home, you would not have to stay there forever. She’ll have your father, and she has enough money to hire a nurse.”
He shook his head. “It’s ridiculous to hypothesize such a thing—shewillwalk again. I’ve seen her leg—it’s still there. She’ll have a limp at the very worst. She’s still beautiful—she can move about in society and have a gripping story to entertain her acquaintances. It’s my guess she’ll have every unmarried gentleman within a hundred miles standing in line for hours, begging to hear her tell it in her own charming, melodramatic words.”
For the next few minutes, they sat in stiff silence while Madeline drank her tea. When she finished, she stood up to leave, for she didn’t know what else to say to Adam. She couldn’t change the way things were. Diana still loved him and wanted him, and Madeline—no matter how angry she was at her sister for how she had been treating her—could not kick her when she was down.
Adam stood also. “Wait, you didn’t answer my question.”
“What question?” Whatever it was, she feared it.
“If Diana recovers and finds happiness—” his tone softened a bit “—will you consider returning to Cumberland?”
The very idea that he was asking her filled Madeline with such yearning her whole being came alive. All her life, she had smothered her emotions, kept them quietly still within, but at this moment, they were thrashing about inside her, leaping to life, fighting to get out! She slowly turned to face him.
Adam watched her briefly, then moved around the table that stood between them. He took her chin in his hand and lifted it, forcing her to look at him. “The other day, when you walked away from me, I was angry at you for shutting me out. I’m still angry at you for ignoring me every day since, but God help me, I burn for you and I can’t stop it.”
“I had no choice,” she explained. “I’m sorry, Adam, but I can’t betray Diana, not when she is still so in love with you.”
“Yet you will not let me tell her the truth to end it.”
She gazed up at him imploringly, wishing he would release her, but release her from what? She was not his prisoner. He was not holding her captive. Adam merely held her chin in his hand. She could leave if she wanted to.
