A warm evening breeze lifted a lock of Gwen’s hair, and she closed her eyes, relishing the moment—because these were the words she had dreamed of hearing ever since Eric had moved out.
But today, he’d called her because he was getting serious with another woman and he was feeling confused. The last thing she wanted to be was a shoulder to cry on if he was simply having cold feet.
“Let’s not forget,” she said, “that you were the one who wanted to separate. I never wanted that. I was happy with the status quo.”
“Happy?” Eric replied. “That’s not a word I would use to describe the situation. Neither of us was happy, and you know it.”
Tension twisted through her body, because here they were, doing it again. It was the same old argument, like a broken record.
Yet he was not wrong. She could see that now. The past year, living alone, had given her a clearer perspective on how they’d behaved toward each other after the loss of Lily.
“You’re right,” she said with a sigh of surrender. “We weren’t happy. But we’d just lost a child. I’m not a psychologist, but I’m pretty sure my unhappiness was warranted, given the circumstances.”
“But you wouldn’t talk to me,” he argued. “You’d disappear into the bedroom in the middle of the day, and you wouldn’t come out. It was like you blamed me for what happened.”
“I didn’t blame you,” she insisted. “You blamed yourself—we both blamed ourselves—so you were projecting your feelings onto me. And I stayed in the bedroom because every time I came out, you were pushing me to cheer up. You kept insisting that I just needed to stop moping around the house. You treated me like I was a crybaby who wouldn’t get up and simply dust myself off.”
Eric was quiet for a moment while Gwen’s heart pounded with frustration and regret. Why did they always end up arguing? Why couldn’t they just admit their mistakes and let it go? Figure out a way to get back to what they once were and simply love each other?
Of course, she knew the answer. She was still angry with him for leaving her when she needed him most. And she was hurt by his relationship with Keri. Gwen remembered all too well when he had first begun dating Keri—a much younger woman who smiled and laughed all the time and wanted to go dancing and drinking until three in the morning on Saturdays and rent electric scooters to zip around the city on Sundays. And post everything on Instagram, of course. At the time, Gwen had not had the emotional energy to compete with that, so she hadn’t bothered to fight to get Eric back. That didn’t mean she hadn’t been completely heartsick over it.
Eric cleared his throat and spoke softly. “Maybe I wasn’t the best husband. I should have been more patient. I’m sorry. I do regret that.”
His words caught Gwen off guard. This was the first time Eric had ever acknowledged his part in the breakdown of their marriage. Mostly, he’d blamed Gwen’s grief for their troubles.
But now he was calling to tell her that his girlfriend was hinting at marriage. Did that mean their marriage was truly over?
“I’m not sure what you want me to say,” Gwen murmured sadly, standing on the wooden deck in front of the wineshop, looking down at people seated at outdoor tables, enjoying dinner under the trees. “Or why you called. What is it that you want exactly?”
Perhaps he was just trying to be kind and give her some closure before he asked for a divorce.
Eric groaned, sounding frustrated with himself. “I don’t know. Maybe I’m just looking for advice.”
Advice?
“You know me better than anyone,” he continued. “I want to know what you think I should do.”
“Um ...” She shook her head and tried to make sense of this conversation. “I’m not sure what you’re asking me.”
“Advice about Keri,” he explained. “What should I do? Should I keep dating her? Or not?”
Gwen’s stomach clenched with disbelief, and she covered her forehead with a hand. “Seriously? I can’t tell you what to do, Eric. It’s your life, and you’re a grown man. You’ll have to figure that one out on your own.” She turned and started walking toward the restaurant. “I’m sorry, but I have to go. My reservation was at seven, and you know how I hate being late for things.”
“I remember,” he said.
“I’ll talk to you later.” Gwen ended the call and hesitated at the bottom of the stairs, waiting for her heart to quit pounding before she entered the restaurant.
A moment later, the hostess led Gwen to the table where Peter was seated and waiting. As luck would have it, it turned out to be her regular table with Eric. After the phone call just now, it was jarring to see Peter sitting there.
“Hi,” he said, rising to his feet, his blue eyes smiling. “I was getting ready to send out a search party.”
Gwen sat down across from him and hung her purse on the back of the chair. “Sorry I’m late. I had to take a phone call. I was outside in the courtyard for the past ten minutes.”
“Nothing wrong, I hope.”
Gwen reached for the glass of ice water that was waiting for her. “It depends on how you look at it. It was my husband, Eric.”
Peter reached for his water as well and took a sip. “You mentioned you were separated. Is everything okay?”
