Instead of saying anything, he kisses my forehead and sets me on my feet. He makes quick work of my clothes and then his own. I’m dazed by how efficient he is while undressing us; it’s kind of like his superpower or his magic or something.
What I don’t allow myself to think about is how many women he’s undressed for him to have such skills. Nope. Thinking about that is a bad idea.
Hawkins leads me into the shower after he turns it on and allows it to warm up for a moment. “Come on, Hollywood,” his voice is soft. “Let me clean you up before I fill you with my cum again.”
The promise in his voice has goosebumps rising all over my body and the warm water cascading over my skin does nothing to stop them. But I force myself to be smart. For about three seconds.
“We should talk about that,” the words feel wrong, even though they’re right. “I’m on birth control and it’s been a while since I’ve been with anyone. I got tested for my yearly physical and it’s all good for me.”
His fingers tangle in the hair at the back of my head and he tugs. The movement forces my head back and I look in his blue eyes. They’re burning in a way which makes me want to rub my body against his and never fucking stop.
How the fuck does this man manage to turn me inside out and into a version of myself I’ve never met before. I’ve never felt this kind of fire. I’ve never lived inside this kind of desire.
Only with him.
Only for him.
“I realize you have no reason to trust me,” his voice is strained, like he’s barely holding himself back. It makes me feel powerful. Invincible. “But I will never do anything that could put you in harms way. Not on purpose. I was tested not long ago and I’m good. I won’t try and pretend I was ever a monk, Quincy, but you don’t have anything to worry about.”
“Okay,” my voice wobbles slightly.
Not from fear. From the weight of it all. Hawkins blowing into my life has been a lot and it makes me feel off balance, but not in a way I hate. It’s odd because the alarm bells you’d think would be going off are silent.
It’s possible they’re defective, but I don’t think so.
I think it’s just him.
His hands glide along my skin and I give myself over to the feeling of it. He washes me from head to toe, his blue eyes taking in every inch of me as he does. It makes me want to show off. For him; for his enjoyment.
“You’re fucking stunning, Quincy,” he grits out through his clenched teeth.
Then his fingers slip between my thighs, and he plunges two fingers deep inside of my soaked pussy. Everything beyond the feel of the water on my skin and his strength surrounding me while giving me pleasure disappears.
My hands grip his shoulders and my nails dig in. I cling to him because I’m incapable of doing anything else. “Please,” I plead as my head falls back on my shoulders and I gasp when his thumb finds my clit.
He finger fucks me and I can feel his focus on me, watching every breath I take and every emotion flit across my face. I’m right on theedge, teetering into what I know is going to be an orgasm which will steal my breath and have me floating.
Right before I come, Hawkins pulls his fingers from my pussy. He holds me steady, which is good considering my knees are downright fucking weak, but everything else stops. My eyes snap open and I look at the smug, eager expression on his face.
“That wasn’t very nice, Hawkins,” I whine slightly and he tips his head back and laughs.
But the heat in his eyes when he looks at me again tells me he’s far from done with me. And I’m here for it.
His movements are efficient, almost brisk, as he dries me off and then leads me toward the bed. When we’re a few steps away, he stops me and circles me once, his hands roaming over me, caressing me, and causing me to shiver.
He squeezes my hips. His fingertips glide along the underside of my breast. The callouses of his palm snag on my skin as he caresses my rib cage.
“You get told all the time how beautiful you are,” his voice is a rasp that rings through me, my body aligning to hear him, to learn him, to trust him. “But you don’t see it. You’ve probably never seen it. You look in the mirror and see the girl you once were and the woman the industry created, but you aren’t sure where you fit into it all.”
I gasp as I look at him when he stops in front of me, his gaze intent. My eyes fill with tears. “I’m the same way,” he admits, his voice a whisper. “I look in the mirror and still see the kid who no one wanted, the one who was too skinny because food wasn’t a guarantee, and who was dirtier than he should have been because no one cared.” His chest expands and I press a hand to where his heart is pounding hard. “Now I see the guy my brothers need me to be, the one who finds the joke and who always has a smile while being there to help.”
“You’re not that guy?” I ask the question before I can stop myself, my head tilting slightly as I look at him.
“I lovemy brothers and my club. I’ll always have their backs, and I’ll always be there to help them. Always.”
“But you don’t want to wear the mask all the time,” I murmur the words which feel like they come straight from my soul.
Instead of answering me, Hawkins takes my mouth in a kiss that is all teeth and tongue. It’s feral in a way that has my blood pumping harder through my veins. While melting against him, knowing his large frame will hold me up and keep me safe, I give into the feeling of being in his arms.
