We stand like that, in the empty locker room, for a longtime. Nate cries until his voice is nothing, and still, he clings to me like he can’t let go, and I would never ask him to.
When his breathing slows, and he pulls back to meet my eyes, all the heartbreak and the anger and the guilt hanging between us fades away.
None of it matters anymore.
All that matters is Alex.
With Nate in no shape to drive, I take him back to the hospital. I was planning on dropping him off, but he’s clinging to my hand and looking at me with those shattered blue eyes, and Ican’tleave him.
When we arrive at Alex’s room, he stops.
“It‘s really bad, Iris,” he says, speaking for the first time since the locker room. I nod, squeezing his hand, offering support as he pushes the door open.
And even though Nate warned me. Even though I knew he was hurt, nothing could have prepared me for seeing him like that.
Alex is…
He doesn’t even look like himself.
I’ve gotten to know Nate’s brother, underneath that tough exterior. He’s silly, and he loves junk food and his guitar. He’s one of the best people I know, and now, seeing him like this? Hearing what Jason said in the locker room?
I can’t comprehend it.
I don’t want to.
Nate lets go of my hand and goes to sit by Alex’s side in a chair pulled up to the bed, while Liz offers me a cup of coffee. I nod toward Nate, who needs it much more than I do.
In a hushed voice, I tell her what happened at the school.When I tell her about the punch, she grimaces, knowing as well as I do that hitting a student could end his career.
“I’m glad you were there,” she says. “I would’ve encouraged him.”
Seeing the state Alex is in, I think I made a mistake stopping him.
Liz had to go home, so it’s just us as the minutes stretch into long hours.
The nurses come in and check vitals, murmuring caring words they know won’t make us feel better. Alex has been in and out all day, but hasn’t fully woken up yet. At some point, close to midnight, Nate starts to nod off in the chair.
“Nate, why don’t you take the couch?” I pat the spot beside me. “We can trade spots for a while.”
He nods, standing up with a yawn, but he doesn’t wait for me to get up. Instead, he crashes down onto the couch, putting his head in my lap, closing his eyes instantly.
I go still, aware that this is too close.
Toointimate.
But I look back at Alex, and down at Nate, who hasn’t spoken a word since we got here, but still came to me for comfort.
He needs me, and that matters more than my insecurities.
I try to relax, brushing my fingers through his hair, until the rise of his chest evens out.
I’ve started to doze, leaning my head on the back of the couch, when a quiet, broken sound pulls my attention to where Alex is sleeping a few feet away.
The eye that isn’t swollen shut flutters open, his breathingpicking up as he starts to panic. His gaze darts around, and I can see from here that he’s terrified.
“Nate?” He says into the quiet, his voice quiet gravel.
Nate jerks awake instantly.
