Chapter Twenty-Five
Pony Expresso waspacked but not with the usual customers. Most of it was her family and friends of Enrique. The celebration party was being held in the evening after closing. Perhaps this was why everything felt weird.
After her honest conversation with her uncle, she sensed a weight had been lifted from her shoulders. It certainly didn’t solve everything. Her parents were still the same as they had always been. In fact, they got into a small argument when they first arrived. She saw them, or her place between them, differently. Both her parents loved her and her family. This had always been true. And, in spite of her frustration with them, she loved each of them. But she couldn’t change them. She accepted her parents’ issues were theirs and they didn’t have to be hers. This new perspective pushed some of the stressful parts of her life from her heart as if it was making room for other things.
She was doing her best to enjoy the New Year’s party that was also celebrating her new official business position, but something was missing—or, rather, it was someone who was missing.
Natalie had sent Mason an invitation but never received a reply in return. She didn’t blame him. She’d been in the wrong and had treated him horribly. And, yet, there was one tiny bit of hope, a small spark in the dark, that maybe he’d see her invitation for what it was: a chance for her to apologize and maybe get things right for a change. She had hoped he’d somehow be able to look past all the hurt she’d caused, and still want to see her.
Except the party had been going for an hour and a half and there hadn’t been any sign of Mason.
Nothing.
Natalie did her best to plaster a smile on her face, pretending she’d never been happier, doing her best to side-step any inquisitive questions about Mason’s whereabouts. She did her best to concentrate on Mia who was chatting away about some funny incident that happened during a photography job she had done recently for the Parks and Rec Department of Placerville, when a figure outside the shop caught her attention.
It was him.
He had come.
Natalie, heart hammering, sucked in a breath.
“What’s wrong?” Mia asked before following her line of vision. “Oh,” she said with understanding, but Natalie barely heard.
He walked past the shop windows with his hands stuffed in his jacket pockets, shoulders hunched as though this helped block the winter wind, but he wasn’t in a hurry, as though it was a casual stroll on Main Street. He stopped at the door, his hand outreached, but seemed to change his mind, hand dropping. It lifted once more, before dropping for good. He turned, returning to his previous path.
He wasn’t coming.
He’d tried but couldn’t do it.
Natalie became desperate, pushing past relatives as she made her way to the shop entrance and outside. The air was biting, she didn’t have a jacket, but she didn’t feel the cold, only potential devastation. “Mason.”
He stopped before slowly turning to face her. “Hi.”
She rushed to cover the steps between them. “You’re not going to come in? We have food and drinks and stuff. I even have a new drink for the occasion.” She was rambling nonsense, but she couldn’t help it.
“Yeah, I’m not really up for it. I’m sorry. I thought I could do this, but I’m not so sure it’s a good idea.”
She latched on to his arm, afraid this might be her last chance, cursing herself for every time she had put up a roadblock between them in the past because experiencing it on the other side sucked. Natalie realized it was now or never. “Listen. I’m really sorry about everything. I just got scared that I was going to repeat past mistakes, and I took it out on you because it was easier than facing how much of a disaster I am. All I did was create more of a disaster because maybe I’m so used to it, it feels normal. But I’d rather choose something different this time. I’d rather choose you.”
His expression didn’t ease, instead he appeared more conflicted. “You’re not the only one who’s scared. I’ve been scared about a lot of things, but you were the one thing in my life that I felt sure of. And then, completely out of the blue, you dropped me. How am I supposed to be able to move forward knowing you can do that to me again? I don’t know if I’m strong enough.”
He’d made his decision. He wasn’t going to give her another chance. Natalie rubbed a hand across her cheek to wipe away a tear before she straightened her spine, pulling herself together.
“Come on.” She grabbed his arm again, encouraging him toward the door.
“Natalie, I don’t think—”
“There’s something I want to show you.” Thankfully, he let her lead him inside the shop where he received greetings and cheers from her family. This gave her some hope. As Mia had told her, a person couldn’t be persuaded if they didn’t want to do something in the first place. Perhaps he hadn’t shut the door completely; there was still a part of him that wanted this, wanted her. If she had to shove her shoulder against the door and push her way inside, she was going to try.
She took him to the Christmas tree, which still stood in the corner of the shop. Despite her best intentions for prolonging the white fir on life support, its needles were drying out. Natalie hadn’t the heart to toss it yet as she’d become attached.
She pulled him closer so they could block out the crowd and they could talk with some privacy. “Look, I’m not a sentimental person. For much of my life most of this stuff hasn’t mattered to me. And then you came along and—Well, maybe I’ve been settling for fake Christmas trees my whole life because it’s easier, less messy. You made me realize how much I was missing out on the real thing. You’ve made me a real Christmas tree type of person, and not because I think everyone needs a real Christmas tree to celebrate the holidays or that people can’t celebrate in their own ways, but I want this for you. See? I added some ornaments.”
She pointed to them through unshed tears. “There’s a barn. A poinsettia. And a stack of board games, and a cool Diva Santa. Oh, and my grandma helped me make this one out of felt because I couldn’t find one at the hardware shop. It’s supposed to be a waffle. It’s not very good and I stuck myself pretty bad while sewing it.” She presented her bandaged pointer finger as evidence.
Mason’s gaze went to the bandage before returning to the ornaments hanging on the tree, his mouth slightly open, completely speechless. Finally, he said, “Why?”
“Well, because I love you and this makes you happy. You’re worth all the effort and bandaged fingers. And I hope it’s not too late and you think I’m still worth it even after I royally screwed up.”
