He turns on the shower and carefully, I undress while he does the same. As I do so, the blood that soaks my clothing stains my hands. Nik’s blood. The once dried tears start up again, and Bash carries me into the shower.
In utter silence, he washes me. There’s nothing sexual about the process despite our nudity. He even cleans my hair, and once we get out, he detangles it. I don’t bother blow drying my bangs; I don’t have it in me to care how they dry.
And when Bash leads us to bed, I glance at the clock. It’s well past midnight. I crawl into bed, and he pulls me into him. I grip him as though he’s my lifeline, and only once my tears dry, am I able to fall asleep.
Chapter 46
Lizzy
The days following the attack pass in a blur. We attended the funeral for Nik and the memorial following events in honor of him. I made my peace with his passing, and since then, have been trying to be there for Katerina, but we’re not very close, and she’s struggling in her own way. So, here I am, baking muffins for her.
I know they have a chef, but I figured a home-cooked meal could help cheer her up. And baking has been cathartic for me. I considered finding a therapist after the events that occurred, but I think they’re mandatory reporters, and I’m not sure how I could get help while also not admitting to everything that happened.
Bash caught me researching therapeutic techniques and did his own research on therapy. Now, he’s acting as my therapist. He ensures we go on our runs and do things that bring me joy. Despite the horror that occurred, I feel safer than I have been in years knowing my past is gone. No one will ever come for me again. Bash will ensure it.
He’s also taken it upon himself to teach me how to properly shoot a gun despite my protests. I have no good memoriesrelated to the weapon, but I do it to appease him. He worries about my safety nonstop and feels as though he failed me, which is ridiculous.
“It smells so good in here,” a deep voice moans from behind me, followed by a stomach growling.
“Not for you!” I warn my salivating boyfriend as I turn to face him. When he wraps his arms around my waist, I bring mine around his neck.
“Hey, angel,” he murmurs then presses his lips against my forehead in a quick kiss. Leaning down, he tucks his head in the crook of my neck, and inhales deeply. At first, I’m blushing at the notion, then I realize he’s sniffing the dessert, not me.
Slow movement behind me draws my attention, and I break away just in time to see him shoveling half a muffin into his mouth. I swat his hand, but I’m too late. The rest of the blueberry muffin disappears between his lips.
“This is not for you!” I chastise him, showing no mercy, even as his face crumbles.
He stares at me in disbelief, but underneath it, there’s a hint of mischief. “But you made so many!”
“Doesn’t matter.”
“Shouldn’t I be carb-loading for our long run tomorrow?” He raises a brow as though he’s caught me, and the move alone has my insides fluttering. Damn him for being so sexy.
“You can make us pasta for dinner.” I grin as I give him the order teasingly, but we both know there’ll be pasta ready by sundown. He doesn’t know how to tell me no, and I don’t think he’d want to anyway.
“Yes, ma’am,” he says with a wink, then leans down. I meet his kiss, but this time, I swat the muffin he’s sneaking out of his hands before it can clear the counter.
“Gotcha!”
He gazes longingly at the pastries on the counter. If I hadn’t witnessed him eating a large breakfast this morning, I’d be convinced he was starved. “Can you at least save a few for us?”
“Us or you?”
“What’s mine is yours,” he says sweetly.
I roll my eyes. “That’s not true. We aren’t even married.”
“Don’t tempt me.” The twinkle in his eyes tells me he’s not entirely joking. I haven’t given marriage much thought, but now, I know my future is that of Mrs. Lizzy Montclair. “You know you’re my beneficiary, right?”
My head whips in his direction, all thought of the future vanishing. “You’re joking,” I demand, mouth agape.
“Why would I be joking?”
“I–” Pausing, I think it over. “Actually, I’m not surprised. When did you do that?”
“When I moved here.” He grins and pecks my lips. “You’re my perfect angel, and my future always led to you, Lizzy. I love you.”
“I know you do,” I cheekily respond to his declaration, earning me a glare.
