Absolutely not!
“I just… I want to see you,” her voice warbled as she fought tears. “It’s stupid. I shouldn’t?—”
“You chose him, Vanessa.”
“Fine, okay, but… I am starting to question if?—”
“Vanessa, I am?—”
A knock shook me.
“Your Royal Highness, we need to take our seats for landing,” John said.
“Understood, John. Just a moment.” I turned back to Nessa. “Baby, I gotta go. I cannot keep doing this with you.”
“What if… what if you just left? What if we ran away together. We could start a family and live a quiet life?—”
“Nessa, that would never be possible. This is my life.”
“You don’t even care for it! You always said you’d rather be wrapped up in my pussy than stuck at engagements, Duncan. We could buy a little slice of paradise in Italy and raise babies. It would be everything you ever wanted.”
“You would leave your husband for that?” I asked.
“Duncan!” Eloise rapped. “We are going to lose our spot in the pattern. Can you please come sit?”
“Who is that?” Nessa asked.
The woman I think I’m falling for.I felt like a cheating piece of shit talking to Nessa.
“No one,” I lied. “I gotta go, okay?”
“Tell me for a fact you wouldn’t have done it differently,” Nessa leveled. “We shared all of this. We shared a life, Duncan. I regret so much.”
“I do, too,” I said, “but we’re not a thing, Ness. I must go.”
I hung up, unlocked the door, and promptly left to my seat. Eloise sat diagonally, looking uncomfortable and concerned. Guilt surged. I never should have answered Nessa. I should have brought Eloise a tea or something to settle her stomach or make her feel at ease. I couldn’t be here with her and still live in the past.
53
CONFRONTATION
ELOISE
Iheld Duncan’s phone as we toured a hospital in Newfoundland. When we were “on”, it was my job to screen calls. His focus was on engagements, not digital distraction. It wasn’t unusual that he would get a text or two—normally from his parents or cousins. Often it would be Leah’s children sending him various emojis. He always responded in a timely manner. But today, the number of buzzes caught me off guard.
His escape to the office confused me earlier. After unburdening myself on him a week ago, I thought we shared everything. That was clearly naive. He was still the boss. I was still the help. And today, I was even more irritable. I checked his phone to see several notifications from “Joe”. Before I could even look at them, I nearly doubled over with pain.
“Are you quite alright?” John asked.
“I’m… I’m fine,” I lied, refocusing on the texts.Who was Joe?
Joe
It’s okay if you don’t feel like that.
I only wanted to tell you.
I love you. Now, that I know you still love me, I can’t forget it.
