She couldn't bring herself to do it, though it tore her to shreds inside to deny herself the pure pleasure. She desperately wanted to hear his voice, but she knew once she did, it wouldn't be enough. Frustrated, she walked into her bathroom, started the shower, and washed away any remnant of Jax’s scent from her. No amount of water could remove the other man from her thoughts, her fantasies.
When she dragged her soapy washcloth between her legs, her sex clenched from the slightest friction. The intensity of the sensation nearly brought her to her knees. Need for a release mixed with her desire for him, and it rippled through her, heightening all of her nerve endings. She removed the handheld shower head from its cradle to rinse the soap from her body and then let it linger at the apex of her thighs. She closed her eyes, dropped her head back, and pictured him there in the shower with her.
Frustration transformed into exasperation when the jet stream of water did nothing to bring relief. Elle quickly dried off then climbed into bed. As soon as she closed her eyes, the image of him was there again, mocking and teasing her from afar. Her hand slid down, finding the silky wetness between her legs. Since he refused to leave her memories, she stopped resisting and allowed them to run rampant through her mind. With his name on her lips, she climaxed while she envisioned her initial rendezvous with him eight years earlier.
Though, it still felt like just yesterday.
Lying in bed alone after a long day on the set, eight years after their first night together, she could feel his touch on her skin. She smelled the masculine scent of his cologne. Wood, amber, and earthy spices mixed with the heady aroma that made up his signature scent. She rolled over in bed, pulled the extra pillow close to her in a lonely hug, and let the tears fall wherever they landed. She missed him so much. At twenty-eight, she was fatigued and burned-out from modeling since age twelve, and she found she wished for a simpler life. With him.
What would her life be like if she’d stayed with him all those years ago? That question had played on a constant loop in her mind since the day she told him she had to leave. When he asked her not to go. When she’d decided her career was more important.
As she slipped into a restless slumber, words from her youth returned and taunted her with what she couldn’t have.
No one else will ever compare to Devon Kane.
* * *
The sun hadn’t even madea hint of an appearance when the alarm went off. With her eyes still closed, she smacked the clock to stop the irritating noise that dared to pull her from one of the best dreams she’d had in months. The scene in her mind was more realistic than any movie set she’d been on. Cool wind blew on her face, sending her long locks flying in every direction, as she strode hand in hand with Devon through the grassy clearing on the mountaintop. The weight of the world was lifted from her shoulders, and she was without a care in the world for the first time since she entered the modeling contest. Her demure smile was genuine and conveyed the contentment she felt inside—her life with Devon was simple. Easy. Stress-free.
“Elle, time to get up,” Beth said from the doorway. “We have an early morning scene to shoot, so we have to get you into hair and makeup before Jax gets there. He primps longer than any woman I’ve ever seen.”
With the grace and elegance of a zombie, Elle slid out of bed and walked straight to the shower. The spray of hot water helped her to peel her eyes open and face the long day ahead of her. She was thankful for one advantage of being on a movie set—her hair, makeup, and clothes would be done for her, sparing her the time and energy it would take otherwise. After she towel-dried her hair and threw on comfortable clothes, she and Beth left together for the studio.
The lot was eerily quiet that early in the morning, when it was still dark and most of the cast and crew on the other sets hadn’t yet arrived. Security patrolled the area in golf carts, their serious expressions daring anyone out of place to step foot inside the gates. Still, when Elle and Beth stepped out of the car, a troubled chill surged up Elle’s spine, and she looked around the darkened lot nervously.
“Everything all right, Miss Sinclair?” a deep voice asked from behind her.
She quickly turned and immediately recognized the familiar face of one of the foot patrol security guards. “Yes. Just spooked myself, I guess.”
“I’ll escort you ladies to the makeup trailer to make sure you get there safely.”
Elle smiled and nodded, relieved they weren’t alone, and turned with Beth to cover the short distance to shelter.
“Will Mr. Hart be joining you this morning?” the guard asked.
Elle stifled a laugh, knowing all too well why he asked about Jax’s presence. The reputation of diva-like demands from some stars preceded them. With Jax, however, his outrageous demands made him the ire of most lower-level cast and crew members who’d had the misfortune of working with him. One of Jax’s main rules was no crew member was allowed by contract to make direct eye contact with him—including security.
“Mr. Hart will be here early this morning, but I’m not sure what time. We arrived earlier than usual,” Elle explained.
Elle had vowed early in her movie career she’d never be known as one of those actors—the ones like Jax who distanced themselves from everyone who supported their work. Keeping her down-to-earth personality had benefited her more than once. She’d found out firsthand that the people who were paid to cater to her needs were much more willing to make her time on the set easier just because she was kind to them.
When they’d stepped inside the trailer, Elle turned to the guard and gave him her sincerest smile. “Thank you for walking with us, Roy.”
“Yes, thank you so much. Same time tomorrow morning?” Beth flirted.
Roy’s smile spread across his face. “My pleasure, ladies. Have a good day.”
Elle closed and locked the door, the uneasy feeling still lingering in her chest. Beth watched her movements closely as she prepared her makeup supplies. “What’s wrong, Elle?”
“I just have a bad feeling, Beth. Nothing’s happened, but it just feels like we’re being watched.”
“It’s probably all the rumors that have been flying around the studio lots the last few weeks,” Beth replied offhandedly.
“What rumors?”
“You know,” she insisted. “About the actress who was reported missing from one of the other stages.”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about, Beth.”
