I cursed my mom as the elevator rose several levels, and as soon as the doors opened, I stomped to room 8143. All night, I’d been tempted to sneak up to his room, but neither of us had wanted to upset my mom; she’d put so much into planning our perfect day.
And now, Ben was suffering.
Pressing the card against the fob, I pushed the door open, and my gaze immediately landed on Ben. He was sitting on the bed, hunched over as he stared at the floor with his hands on his knees. He’d managed to get as far as putting his shirt and pants on, but he was missing his shoes, socks, and bowtie.
At the sound of the door opening, his head lifted. Seeing who it was, he shot up and was in front of me in a heartbeat.“Bug.”His hands grabbed my hips as if I were his lifeline.“What are youdoing here? Please don’t tell me you’ve come to call the wedding off?”
“Of course I’m not here to call the wedding off. I can’t wait to marry you, you maniac.”Tension oozed from his body, his eyes squeezing closed before they opened again, this time shining in relief.“Dad said you were going out of your mind. What’s happened?”
He sighed heavily.“I had a dream last night.”
“Like before?”
He’d told me about the visions he’d had a couple of years ago, convincedthatthey were real. Maybe they were, I didn’t know for sure, but dream or vision, they’d been a huge factor in Ben opening his heart and changing his life. And mine.
“No. Not this time. It was definitelyjusta dream.”He sucked in a shaky breath, his gaze dropping to the floor.“You said you didn’t love me.”
“Baby.”Using my thumb, I tilted his chin up to make him look at me. The sorrow in his eyes broke my heart, and I shifted forward to rest my head against his, knowing exactly what I needed to say to him to help.“The first time I met you, I wanted to hate you.”His eyes narrowed on me, and he opened his mouth to reply, but I put my finger over his lips.“Justlisten. I wanted to hate you, but I couldn’t. I don’t know what it was about you, but I couldn’t get you out of my head. You fascinated me, and I was determined to see past the walls you’d built around yourself. When we started spending more time together, and you started to let those walls down, I discovered you had a good, kind heart. But it was fragile, and I hatedthatyou didn’t feel you could trust anyone.”I paused to stroke my thumb over his cheek.“But you found it in yourself to take a chance on me. You gave me your heart, trustingthatI would look after it and keep it safe, and I’m so glad you did because it’s led us to where we are now.”
I swallowed past the lump in my throat, hopingthatI could make it through the next part of the vows I was supposed to be saving for later without letting my happy tears fall.“So I stand in front of you today to tell youthatI love you, andthatyou will never have to worry about your heart being broken, because I vow to youthatfor as long as I live, I will keep it safe with mine. I love you, Ben McScroodge, and I can’t wait to become your husband.”
Tears shimmered in his eyes, and for several seconds, we stared at each other, our hearts beating in rhythm.
“Wasthatyour vows?”he finally asked, pulling his head away from mine.
“Yeah. I know I was supposed to save them for later, but I couldn’t hold them in any longer, not when I needed you to know how I feel about you. How could you ever thinkthatI wouldn’t show today, baby?”
He shook his head gently.“Maybe because I still don’t think I deserve you.”
I pressed my lips against his.“Maybe you need to start believingthatyou do.”He smiled, but it didn’t quite meet his eyes, and I knew he’d spend the rest of his life believing he didn’t deserve me.
I’d just have to work hard to prove that he did.
“Can I tell you my vows?”he said with a hint of hesitation in his voice as if he was worried I would say no.
I grinned at him.“Hell yes.”
He pulled out a piece of paper from his pocket.“I wish I could remember what I’d written without needing this like youjustdid.”
I stopped him from unfolding the paper.“What I said wasn’t what I’d written down. It was what I wanted you, and only you to know.”
His brows lifted, and after gaping at me for several seconds, he repocketed the paper and cleared his throat.“Bug. My Bug. My world. There’s so much I could say, but we’d be here all day, and I think your mom might kill us if we’re late for our own wedding.”We both chuckled before he took my hands.“The day we met, I didn’t knowthatyou would become my everything. I didn’t know you would become my reason for breathing. But you are, Bug. You changed my life, and you’ve given me so much more than I ever thought I deserved. You’ve given me a family, you’ve given me your trust, but you give me something I’ve never had before. Your love.”He paused to inhale a shaky breath.“I vow to you, Bug,thatI’ll never take your love for granted, andthatI’ll spend the rest of my life loving you. I’ll be the man you deserve, and I’ll never stop fighting for us. I love you, Tristan Crutchens, and I can’t wait for our future to begin.”
I knew it would happen. I knew I wouldn’t get through the day without shedding tears, and rightthen, they were streaming down my cheeks.
Wrapping a hand around the back of Ben’s neck, I pulled his mouth to mine. Our tongues swirled together as we lost ourselves in a slow, sensual kissthatneither of us wanted to break. When a knock sounded at the door, we pulled apart, but we didn’t move.
“It feels like we just got married,” I said, grinning.
“Yeah,”Ben replied, love twinkling in his eyes.
An idea popped into my head, and as I let it grow, I knew Ben would like it.“How about we don’t say our vows again? I mean, we can say something, but I don’t know about you, but I don’t think what I had written was anywhere near what Ijustsaid.”
The smilethatappeared on his face told me what I needed to know before he spoke.“I likethat, Bug. Our vows are for us anyway.”
“And you know what else?”I added. He raised a brow. “I love what my mom and Bella have done for us, but I don’t want to walk down the aisle with my mom, and I don’t want you walking down the aisle with my dad. I want to walk down the aisle holding the hand of the man I love. The man who is going to become my husband.
He kissed me again, only this time it was a brush of our lips, and left me wanting more.“I’m so fucking glad you saidthat, because it’s what I want too.”
