‘Amber, wait!’
But I need time to process Barney’s revelation, so pretend I haven’t heard him. Shoulders stiff, I force myself to keep walking, one foot in front of the other, until I’m out of sight, one thought spiralling in my head.
Why didn’t he tell me?
10
AMBER
I get ready for bed on autopilot, Barney’s words ringing in my ears.Didn’t Amber know Simone and her boyfriend were the original star-crossed lovers?
No, she bloody well didn’t, I think, as I squeeze toothpaste onto my brush and scrub so fiercely my gums start to bleed. I try to remember what Dominic said when he first mentioned the week in Pelagia. He’d described Simone as a ‘uni mate’ whose room was near his in halls. They’d bonded over cheap wine and The Libertines. And that was as far as it went.
Only, apparently, it wasn’t.
All of a sudden, I recall Victoria’s knowing look on the ferry from Corfu. ‘So you’ve seen photos of Simone, and you don’t mind?’ I hadn’t understood what she was talking about then, but I do now.
And I bloody well do mind.
Dominic should have told me they used to be a couple. It would have been no big deal. Everyone’s entitled to a past. And he’s forty-five, for God’s sake. I’d be worried if hedidn’thave baggage. It’s the fact that he kept the relationship from me that stings. Because keeping it secret makes it bigger, somehow. More significant.
No matter how hard I try not to let jealousy get its claws into me, it’s impossible. Dominic’s lies are as sharp and shocking as the sting of a wasp. Why didn’t he tell me? Why?
I turn on the bedside lamp and slip into bed. It’s a beautiful room: simple, whitewashed furniture, gauzy cotton drapes and a huge bed with an ornate carved wooden headboard. There are accents of Greek-flag blue in the shutters, throws and scatter cushions, and the effect is both stylish and tasteful. Classic Simone.
Another thought occurs to me. Did Dominic ask me for a coffee that day at the gym because I looked like her? A younger, less beautiful, less polished version, at any rate. Once the thought has wormed its way into my head it refuses to leave, no matter how many times I tell myself that maybe it’s just a coincidence. Maybe Dominic is partial to tall brunettes. He’s allowed to have a type, isn’t he? Plenty of men do.
I pummel the pillows, trying to get comfy, but it’s no good. Every time I close my eyes, images of Dominic and Simone in bed together barge their way into my thoughts. His hand reaching out to cup her cheek tenderly. Her tongue tracing a line down his chest towards his navel. His brown eyes dark with desire as he undoes her shirt buttons one by one. Her long legs wrapped around his as he slips inside her…
I cradle my head in my hands with a groan. The door clicks open and footsteps pad across the floor. I slow my breathing, feigning sleep. Dominic sits on the edge of the bed.
‘Hey,’ he says softly, smoothing my hair away from my face. ‘Are you awake?’
I shift under the covers and stare at him blearily. His forehead is furrowed, his eyes deep pools of concern.
‘We were worried about you, storming off like that.’
‘I didn’t “storm off”. I was tired and I wanted to go to bed. It’s been a long day.’
He tilts his head, just a fraction, the way he always does when he’s humouring me.
‘Why didn’t you tell me you and Simone used to go out together?’ I blurt. ‘You said you were just friends.’
‘We were. I told you, her room was on the same corridor as mine in halls. She was one of the first people I met.’
‘So why did Barney say you were star-crossed lovers?’
Dominic’s jaw tightens. ‘Because he’s a little shit-stirrer.’
A sliver of hope bursts through the shadows in my mind like a shaft of sunlight through a gap in the curtains, and I cling to it. ‘Are you saying he was lying?’
He closes his eyes briefly, then shakes his head. That bright beam of light is snuffed out like a candle.
‘Why didn’t you tell me?’
‘I didn’t think it was important.’
‘Not important?’ I push myself onto my elbows. ‘Of course it’s important! You know everything about me.’ That’s a lie, but if Dom knew all the sordid details of my past he wouldn’t have given me a second glance that day at the gym.
