Zach:I get it. You need space. But Honeycomb... last night meant something. At least it did to me.
I read the messages three times. Four. My eyes are burning and my chest is so tight I can barely breathe.
I should respond. Should tell him... what? That last night was a mistake? That it meant something to me too, but I don’t know what? That I’m terrified of how easily I fell back into him, how natural it felt, how right?
I lock my phone without responding and shove it back in my pocket.
A TSA agent waves me forward. “Next!”
I grab my bag and keep walking.
Two weeks.
Two weeks before I have to face any kind of reality and make any decisions on things.
That’s more than enough time.
It has to be.
Standing on the port, I look down at the large cruise ship on the brochure and then back up to the small one in front of me.
The Driftwood Voyager.
Yup, that’s my ship, and it might have three floors, five restaurants, two pools, and a casino, but it’s not what I expected. I guess I was hoping for something bigger. Something that felt like a city that I could get lost amongst thousands of people.
This isn’t that.
It looks like it holds space for maybe five hundred.
How am I supposed to get lost in that?
“Excuse me, Miss. Are you boarding? We’re leaving soon,” thenice attendant asks.
Well, here goes nothing.
“Yes.”
She scans my boarding pass, and I head up the ramp to the boat, pulling my suitcase along with me.
Apprehension bubbles in my stomach. If I call it excitement, will that make it feel less like I’m going to throw up? I hope so.
When I’m fully boarded with my room key, a cute busboy offers to take my bag to my room so I can enjoy the departure. I let him solely because I don’t want to start the journey in my room, hiding away from everything.
That’s when it hits.
No suitcase. No friend.
Just me and my purse.
I look around and everyone is mingling, drinking their complimentary champagne, while I’m feeling too queasy to even accept a glass.
I walk over to the edge of the ship and hold on to the side, looking out at the horizon.
So much possibility awaits me. I just need to accept it.
The departure horn blasts one final time as the boat starts to move.
My feet are a tiny bit shaky, but I gain my footing back quickly.
