So no, I can’t pretend life happened to me.
I built this.
I am the architect of every single thing I don’t have, and I’m still not sure whether that makes me proud or miserable.
I settle into the lounger nearest the door, put the book in my lap, and make a genuine attempt to read my book while I wait for the spa day to commence.
The writer’s job is not to close that gap too quickly. Let your character sit in the discomfort of knowing exactly what they want and choosing, again and again, not to take it. The reader will stay for that. What they won’t forgive is a character who never had to fight themselves to get there. That’s not a story. That’s just a series of things that happened.
“Hey, it’s Honey, right?”
I look up and see a familiar face from last night.
Bella?I think that’s her name. She’s standing beside the empty chair with a towel over her arm, and her blonde hair in a high ponytail.
“Sorry for bothering you, but I didn’t want to sit down, and have it be weird.” She holds her hand to her chest. “I’m Bella. Drew’s girlfriend from last night.”
I swallow, forcing out a smile even though my anxiety feels like it’s going into overdrive.
What did Zach tell her over dinner?
Does she think I’m the villain because I haven’t just fallen into his arms?
Has she seen his tattoo?
The air feels a little thinner, so I ping my bracelet, the snap of pain bringing me back into the room.
‘Anxiety is just misplaced fear. You can’t control what other people think about you. The only thing you can control is how you respond.’
Dr. Reeves once again.
I take in a deep breath and unclench my jaw. What other people say about me when I’m not around is not my business, and she’s looking at me earnestly with a wide smile, so it couldn’t have been that bad anyway.
“Hi. Yes, I remember. Do you want to sit down?” I offer the seat, feeling a little foolish considering I don’t own the place. She can sit down wherever she likes.
“Thanks.”
She relaxes back in the lounger, crossing one leg over the other.
That’s when the awkward silence starts to settle in, because what the hell am I supposed to talk about with one of the most beautiful women I’ve ever laid eyes on? Just like Olivia, she’s got her life together, and I’m just a mess.
“So, uh, where’s Drew?” I ask. It’s literally all I’ve got.
She lets out a short laugh. “Not here. Spa days are not in that man’s vocabulary.” She shakes her head, but the smile she’s trying to hide shows the affection she has for him. “Knowing him, he’s probably on a treadmill right now. It’s his favorite thing in the world. The gym, I mean. He’d live there if I let him.” She rolls her eyes. “But I’m sure you understand that.”
“Yeah,” I say quietly, and leave it there.
So, it sounds like Zach told them we were together. Did I really think he’d do anything different?
The life I want to build is with you.
The words feel heavy every time I think about them.
Bella glances at me over the top of her book with a tiny smile on her face.
“Can I ask you something?” she says, dropping her book to her lap.
The question immediately makes me nervous. “That depends entirely on the question.”
