“So…we’re just going to bring him here and not do any sort of monitoring,” I said, feeling a little guilty when he grimaced, but at least he looked away from me.
“There are some things I don’t wish to know about what Jude does or doesn’t do,” he said in a pained voice. “I have to understand that even if he’s freshly an adult…he’s still an adult. Hell, he’s been an adult since he was fourteen in some ways. However, I don’t trust myself to maintain the sort of distance he rightfully deserves, but he’ll still need a connection point.
He was staring at me, and I realized. “I…now hold on a goddamn minute, are you asking me to be his babysitter? Marc!”
“Reggie—”
“No,” I said immediately, letting go of my fork and not caring that it clattered to the desk and left sauce behind it. “You can’t say he needs to be here as an adult, but then assign him a babysitter. And you definitely don’t assignmeas a babysitter! Not only because I should never be responsible for anyone other than myself, but…damn it, Marc. I like that kid, and he likes me. I know I’m not his parent, but he trusts me, and I’m not going to betray that trust by playing double agent with him.”
“I know that.”
“No!” I repeated more firmly. “If you want to give him the chance to be here, then let him be here, as an actual adult. You can’t have your cake and eat it too. Let him be here, or don’t, butdon’t play the middle ground with him. He deserves better than that.”
“In that we agree,” he said quickly, and when he saw my mouth clamp shut in wide-eyed surprise, he snorted. “Am I allowed to speak now?”
I narrowed my eyes, trying to find a trap, but unable to find one. “Fine…what?”
“As I was saying, I don’t trust myself to be the parent he needs,” he said with no shred of guilt or misery. It was the voice of a man who was confident not just in his abilities, but comfortable with his shortcomings…at least in that. “If I were his point of contact here, I fear my protective instincts and…parental discomfort of him experiencing certain things that are important for adulthood would get in the way. I would keep an eye on him, and either get in his way or…as youtriedto be tactful about earlier, bear witness to something I don’t want to see.”
“Right,” I said, less in agreement and more to show I understood what he was saying. “So…where do I come in?”
“Where you come in is that, adult or not…he’s still a young adult who’s going to be operating on his own here,” Marc said, folding his hands in front of him. “Which means it could be beneficial to have someone to guide him if he wants, which would be up to your discretion, not mine. You are, as you put it, someone he likes and trusts, and I suspect he would believe you more willing to give him space than Charlene or me, and I fear he’s right. So, I think you’d be the best candidate for giving him what he wants while also being willing to provide what he needs.”
I stared at him. “You’re telling me to monitor your son and make sure he doesn’t get into trouble?”
“I’m asking you to be there for him, keeping an eye on him but not interfering any more than you would with anyoneelse…maybe a little more,” he said with a smile. “Be his Guide, basically.”
“That…” Okay, it wasn’t as bad as I’d feared, but it was still more than I’d expected. I wasn’t expecting him to put that level of responsibility on me…or trust. “You realize what you’re asking me, right?”
“I do,” he said with a smile. “And I can’t think of anyone I would rather put in that position, even though I know it’s not exactly the most comfortable position.”
“It’s a very…trusting one,” I said, clearing my throat. “Are you sure?”
“Quite.”
“And, uh, what does Charlene think about that?”
“You assume I asked her what she feels about how I handle things in this resort.”
“When it comes to Jude? Yeah, you did.”
He chuckled. “I did; you’re right. Are you sure you want to hear what she said?”
“Better get it out of the way now,” I said with a wince. Charlene wasn’t a cruel or even a mean woman, but she could be unyielding, and when it came to her only child? Oof, yeah, she could be hell on wheels if she thought she was dealing with a threat to his life or well-being.
“She said that if anyone in this ‘mental hell hole,’ her words by the way, was going to keep an eye onherson,” he said with bitter emphasis that, while slight, I didn’t miss. “That she would at least sleep at night if you were doing it.”
“From anyone else, I would sarcastically comment that that isn’t exactly a ringing endorsement,” I said in shock. “Coming from Charlene, though? That’s?—”
“Practically throwing you a parade and giving you a key to the city, yes,” Marc said with a shrug. “I won’t say that I don’t know why she trusts you, because I know all the reasons you aretrustworthy, especially in this. But I will say I’m surprised she took the time to notice. Charlene is…a hard woman to please, and she doesn’t look for reasons totrustsomeone when she can find several reasons to distrust them.”
It was one of the rare times he spoke ill of Charlene, and I couldn’t decide if that was dignity and maturity on his part, or unhealthy self-repression and a need to be in control. I knew enough details of their separation and divorce to understand that while both had played their parts in the slow dissolution of their marriage, the final and irreparable deathblow had come when she had not only been unfaithful but had actively carried on an affair.
While I didn’t condone needlessly and toxically focusing on the things your ex had done in a relationship, you needed to acknowledge what they’d done wrong, and the pain and anger that came with it. As far as I knew, Marc had never done those things. He had every right to hate Charlene, to speak ill of her when Jude or mutual friends weren’t around, but he never did. Even that was less of a bitter comment on her character and more a soft criticism that could almost be considered a checkbox marked off to keep a note of.
“But in this, we are of one mind,” he said with a chuckle that was dry and a little…tired? Bitter? Or maybe just knowing. “And I ask this of you, not because I want our relationship to be the pivotal, deciding factor. I don’t want you to choose with me as a factor.”
“Right,” I said, definitely not agreeing with him. Mostly because there was no way I could think about agreeing or disagreeing without bringing him into it. Jude was his son after all; Marc was my best friend and business partner. There was no way to take him out of the equation, and he should have known better. “Okay, I’ll do it.”
