Ho, boy, right, stay steady, Reggie, stay steady.
“And then I saw you naked earlier and I just?—”
Okay, so his view of our bonding session was a lot different from mine, so there was that to consider.
“And then…I just thought it was my chance, that maybe I could dosomethingand maybe something would happen,” he said.
“I don’t think someone who’s freshly eighteen should start exploring their sexuality or trying to lose their virginity to someone who is over twice their age,” I told him slowly. Then he glanced up at me, and I saw his cheeks color again, and I understood. “Ah, okay. Not exploring when it’s already been explored, and the virginity is gone, got ya. Still, probably shouldn’t consider trying to get with someone with this kind of age gap. It just?—”
“Did you?” he asked.
“Yes,” I said, groaning inwardly. “He was twelve years older than me; thirty when I was eighteen. We had a whole thing for about a year and it was great sex, but it also fucked me up because he used my emotions. Used me. I wasn’t great with relationships, not until?—”
“Uncle Malcolm,” he finished for me, and it stung. Not just because I could practically hear Malcolm’s laughter if he could see what had just happened, but because Malcolm got to be ‘uncle’ while I was the one he was trying to sleep with. What was my life?
“Yeah, until him, and trust me, it was rough for a while there. So don’t make the same mistakes.”
“You wouldn’t do that to me.”
“True,” I said, and then added, “But that doesn’t mean I want to be with you like that. I love you, Jude, but not like that. I care about you, but I don’t want to get naked with you. And for the record, I’m not mad. I’m just…you took me off guard is all.”
“Sorry about that,” he muttered. “I…about everything. Oh shit, you’re going to tell my dad. Who’s going to tell my mom.”
“I…am in no rush to tell him,” I said because holy shit, what was I supposed to say?
Just, “Hey, Marc, you know how we made out this morning, and I promised you something far sloppier before we headed out for the camping trip? Well, it seems your son decided to plant his lips on mine, yep, the same ones you’ve kissed and stuck your dick in, and I don’t know how to feel about that. Anyway, how about a forget about everything fuck session and call it a day?”
I think that would go over about as well as dropping a fox into a henhouse.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered again, and the smallness in his voice broke me for a moment, and I gave in, reaching out to put a hand on his shoulder.
“I’m not mad, you’re not a bad person, you just…read the room wrong is all. Just so long as you understand that it’s never going to happen.”
He nodded jerkily. “And…we never talk about it?”
“Deal,” I told him, and somehow managed to shove everything aside to add brightly, “Now get your shit together, because Marc’s son or not, you’re going to get left behind if you’re not out there on time. We’d like to make camp before the sun sets, got it?”
“Bossy,” he said, but turned away as he spoke so he didn’t see the way I stiffened at the all too familiar tease that should never have come from his lips.
“You know it,” I said as I left the room, calling over my shoulder. “You’ve got twenty minutes!”
Which was about all the time I needed as I sped through the dormitory section toward the elevator. I stopped long enough to slip into a bathroom, and although it would have been cruel to do it in front of Jude, I washed my mouth out. It involved soap, and while I was careful not to drink it, I could still taste it before gargling and spitting it out. There was no way in hell I was goingto walk around the rest of the day without at least symbolically washing away what had just happened.
With that, I made it to the elevator, jamming my pass against the reader a little too aggressively and tapping my feet impatiently as I waited. I wasn’t ready to see Marc standing in the car when the doors slid open, but there he was, surprise on his face.
“Reggie? I was on my way,” he said, his bag at his feet.
“Nope, I promised you something,” I told him, pushing before I could think about what I was doing, making his back hit the back of the car and jamming the button to close the doors.
“I brought your bag too since you left it in my office,” he said cautiously, trying to figure out my mood as the doors finally closed. I waited until the elevator moved, and then jammed my pass against the reader and hit the stop button. That way the car would stop without setting off an emergency.
“What,” he began, but the first thing I did now the elevator was stuck was shove my mouth against his, sucking his bottom lip and making him grunt in surprise. That didn’t stop him from reaching up and curling a hand around my back. His fingers dug in while he held on, but he broke the kiss. “The camera?—”
“Is the one part of the facility that’s never watched because the only people who go through it regularly are you and me,” I told him. “And that one doesn’t record. Now, are you going to accept the sloppiness I promised you, or do I have to beg?”
He blinked. “Why do I taste soap?”
“Rinsed my face, ended up with some in my mouth,” I told him, skirting the truth so hard I was surprised you couldn’t hear the squeal of mental tires as I Tokyo drifted right on past. “Now, are you interested or not?”
