“We did,” J says, “but they sent us back home until she’s dilated more.”
“What’s in the bags?” I ask.
Nash dumps them on the kitchen counter. “Shit from my mother. She loaded me up with it this morning when I dropped over to her place to check her car. Said to tell you she’s already counting down to your next kid.”
I smile. “God I love your mum. Even if she’s dreaming about a kid who will never exist.”
Nash’s eyes narrow at me. “I thought you guys were planning ten fuckin’ kids?”
“Good God, no,” I say. “Who the hell would want ten kids?”
Nash grins and looks at J as he says, “This fucker here.”
“Yeah, well he’s gonna have to figure out how to birth them himself if he wants ten,” I say.
Nash’s grin turns into a laugh. “Don’t underestimate him, Madison. I’m pretty fuckin’ sure J could figure that shit out if it meant he got his football team of kids.”
He looks in the bags his mother sent over. “She’s got all kinds of baby shit in here. Nappies, creams, bibs, and some toys. And this.” He pulls out a small, gift-wrapped box and brings it to me.
I read the card that’s with the gift.
Madison, Don’t forget about YOU once Willow is here. She needs her mother to be happy just as much as her mum wants her to be happy.
Linda xx
Her gift isa bottle of my favourite perfume.
I glance between Nash and J before settling my gaze on J. “You told her my favourite?”
He nods, his face serious but his eyes smiling. “She asked me about a month ago.”
I’ve got my arms around him before I know it, and my lips on his. When I finally drag them from him, I whisper, “Thank you.”
I didn’t even know J knew my favourite perfume. I wear so many that I wouldn’t expect him to be aware of the one I actually love the most. The fact he does causes my heart to squeeze again with love. And gratitude. And fuck me, I’m going to cry.
“Shit,” J says as tears well in my eyes. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” I manage to get out in between blubbering. “It’s all these damn hormones. And Linda. And you. And everyone. And, oh God, Willow’s nearly here and we’re not ready.” I stare at him through my tears. “What if she won’t attach to my boob? What if she cries all day and all night and we can’t soothe her? What if I’m the worst mother known to mankind, and I drop her or accidentally leave her in the car one day or nearly drown her in the bath or?—”
J’s arms come around me and he pulls me close, holding me firmly in the way he does when I stumble and need him to catch me. “Firstly, you are never gonna be the worst mother known to mankind. That’s not fucking possible. Second, whatever shitcomes up, we’ll deal with it together. You’ll never do any of this on your own. I fucking promise you that.”
I bury my face in his chest, breathing in his familiar scent that always calms me. I could stay in these arms, with this chest, for the rest of my life and it wouldn’t be too long. However, my abdomen tightens, and cramps radiate from my lower back around to my front.
Gripping his shirt, I bend slightly, leaning into him while I focus on my breathing. J’s hands instantly move to my back, and he applies some pressure where he knows I need it.
The contraction lasts for about forty seconds at which point I let go of J and start pacing the room again.
“You need me to stay and help?” Nash says, and if I wasn’t dealing with pain and worry and a million racing thoughts, I’d laugh at what I hear in his voice. It’s not often Nash Walker is unsure of shit, but everything about him right now tells me he’s out of his comfort zone here.
I leave J to him and just focus on my walking and breathing.
I completely tune out and don’t notice Nash leaving or J returning to the room. It’s not until J comes back into the lounge room and to me that I zone back in.
“Put your hands around my neck,” he says.
I frown. “Why?”
“We’re gonna try something.” He doesn’t wait for me to do what he said. He takes hold of my hands and brings them up to his neck, positioning them where he wants them. “Now dance with me.”
