“More than we think. Darragh College actually has loads of fae historical items, though they’re regarded as medieval lore. Humans have no idea they’re in possession of magical artifacts,” Arthur said.
“Good thing, too. They can’t use them against us if they have no idea what they are,” Delmare said.
Lucien sighed. “We offered the university a generous donation for the scroll, but as it is a thousand-year old document, and therefore priceless, they refused to part with it.”
“Which means we’re going to have to be sneaky fae and steal it,” I stated flatly.
“Precisely,” Lucien replied. “There is no other way.”
Excitement stirred within me for the first time since we’d found the Seelie stone. If we could get into those archives, we could learn the ceremony to unite the Crystals. Then, once we found the Unseelie stone, we could go to the Sacred Gathering and reopen the portal. Only then this nightmare could end.
It sounded so simple. I feared it was going to be anything but. If there was one thing I knew about fae history, it was always more complicated than it appeared at first glance.
“So how do we plan on stealing the scroll?” I asked. “It won’t be easy getting into those archives.”
Lucien smiled. “Do not worry, my child. I already have a plan in place.”
Gods, I hoped so. I needed the help, because all my energy went to my health these days. I knew I was out of ideas.
I spent most of that night tossing and turning. The pain coursing through my body was so fierce that I couldn’t sleep, not in any position.
Ethan was still up, talking with Lord Lucien. I wanted him at my side, and at the same time, I didn’t want him to see me like this.
The burning sensation spreading through my muscles and bones was so terrible that it brought tears to my eyes. I managed to cast a halfway decent silencing spell around the room before I rolled onto my stomach, buried my face in a pillow and screamed as loud as I could. It wasn’t a scream like any I’d ever heard before. It was rattling, and came from a tortured woman… someone who pleaded with death to take her. As I sobbed into the pillow, Tygrys gave concerned whines above me, shoving his nose into my hair and making sad little mews.
I couldn’t take this anymore. I’d rather die than feel like this. I raised my head off the soaked pillow as my mind desperately searched for a solution.Anysolution.
My mind grasped at the Crystals of Harmony. They had healing abilities. Delmare had used the dragon stone to restore Stefan’s heart, and bring him back to life after he was near certain death.
But she’d had to stab him in order to do so— in the heart, no less. I had decided not to use the Crystals to try and heal my own disability, because using one of the Crystals to take my life, in the hope that it’d end up healing me instead, was too great a risk.
That was then, and this was now. I was desperate. I closed my eyes and willed myself as hard as I could to get to Edinmyre, transporting my spirit to my hearthfire there.
I found myself standing in the living room of my cottage in moments. I felt relief— here, my spirit didn’t feel the pain that my body did, so I got a bit of a reprieve.
I’d be in agony once the meditation ended, though, and I swore that I wasn’t going back to that. I’d either be dead, or I’d be healed. I couldn’t take being sick any longer.
I hurried to the armory. I flung open the door, and reached for the dagger that held the dragon stone that was mounted on the wall. I snatched it, then placed the tip of the blade against my chest.
I took a few steadying breaths. All I had to do was push the blade into my heart, then rip it out, like I’d seen Delmare do to Stefan. It would hurt, but not as badly and not as long as the endless torture my disease provided.
I’d get it over with quickly, and then, I’d be all better. Or, I’d be dead.
At least I had tried.
I began to push it in, until I heard someone utter, “Put down the blade,onawilke.”
Ethan was standing in the doorway of the armory, in his wolf form. His ears were perked up, and his dark eyes bore into me. He appeared calm, although nothing about this situation was okay.
“How did you know I was here?” I rasped out. I was pissed he'd interrupted me.
“I could not wake you from your sleep, and realized you had to be meditating. I sensed something was wrong,” Ethan said. “I understand what you’re feeling is unbearable, but this is not the way.”
“You don’t know what it’s like to live like this!Noneof you do!” I yelled. “If I have to bargain with my existence to get a chance of having a normal life, then it’s worth it!”
“It’s not,” Ethan insisted. “You don’t know what that Crystal will do.Their power is unpredictable.It could kill you as easily as it could heal you.”
“How is this any different than me trying an experimental treatment or surgery?” I snapped back. I didn’t want to listen to him. I just wanted a way out.
