“Exactly. I’m pretty torn.” Ivy stirred their tea. “I’m taking psychology courses next semester, even though I can’treallysay what I’m striving to be, since we both know the Warden wouldn’t allow it. I just put down that I wanted to be a therapist on my major declaration sheet. I’m actually going to be doing an internship with Professor Takahashi over the summer.”
“I am so proud of you.” My eyes began to water.
“Aw, don’t you cry. I’m not anything to fuss over.” Ivy leaned over and wiped a couple of tears away from my eyes.
“It’s just so nice to see my friends succeed and want to achieve their dreams.”
“It gives me a distraction, something to focus on. I kinda need it, because it takes my mind off the juice, and I ain’t opening the club back up again,” Ivy stated.
“You’ve shut down The Devil’s Playgroundfor good?” I asked sadly.
“Yeah. Me and Chance decided it’s just too much temptation for me, and though it’s fun and all, it’s not worth the risk of me going back on drugs.”
I was a little upset, but at the same time, the loss of the club meant nothing so long as Ivy was healthy. “This is great you’re finally getting back on your feet. I know you’re going to be amazing at whatever you do.”
Ivy smiled and went to respond, but before they could, there was a soft, “Eh-hm.”
Esther had come up to our table— without an invitation. She tapped her foot against the rug, and Ivy sneered, “Can we help you?”
“I just came over to make a correction,” Esther replied. “There are only two genders, which are male and female. And since you were born a male, you’re a he. That’s biology. You can’t get around science.”
I rolled my eyes, but Ivy said, “Biological sex and gender are different. Gender is a state that you choose by what feels most authentic to you. And I choose to be both.”
Esther wrinkled her nose. “You’re just making things up. There’s no such thing as nonbinary people, or trans people, or any of that nonsense. If you’rethatmentally ill you can’t accept that you’re a man, you need to go to the infirmary, before you poison the rest of us with your little freak show.”
Esther had never been so actively accusatory. Usually, she hid behind a fake smile and a bunch of backhanded compliments that were actually mean taunts, so people couldn’t accuse her of being an ass later. Right now, she was putting her hatred on full display, and I wasn’t about to put up with it.
“Ivy can be whoevertheywant,” I said coldly. “Just like you have the right to be a massive bitch to everyone you see.”
“It’s against the laws of The Mission!” Esther yelled.
“I suppose the rules don’t apply to me, because I don’t follow your religion,” Ivy said snidely.
Esther sniffed. “The laws of The Mission apply toeveryone.”
I had a grip on a book, ready to toss it at Esther’s head. But Ivy slowly stood and said, “This is who I am. I accept it, and I love myself this way. I don’t need to change who I am, but embrace it. And anyone who doesn’t approve of it, or tries to change me, doesn’t have a place in my life. Maybe if you accepted yourself as you are, then you wouldn’t feel the need to go around and make other people feel bad about being authentically themselves.”
“Are you serious?” Esther let out a laugh that sounded insecure. “I think I’m an awesome person.”
“I don’t think so, Esther. Bullies pick on people to get some sort of validation, because inside, they hate themselves,” Ivy spat. “And I’ve never met anyone who despises herself more than you do.”
Esther’s lip trembled, and it was the most honest response I’d seen from her all day. “Well, I’m not surprised something so crazy would come out the mouth of afreak.”
She whirled around on her heel, dramatically exiting the Villain’s Den. It was at that moment Oberi walked in, hopping on his paws.
It’s a good day. I just saw Esther cry, he noted gleefully.
“Holy shit, you destroyed her,” I said, baffled as I turned back to Ivy.
“It’s the truth. I’m sorry she can’t handle it.” Ivy shrugged. “The laws of The Mission teach that we’re all terrible people who can only be redeemed by guilting ourselves into doing whatever the doctrine tells us to without question. You can’t follow a religion like that without having some sort of inner hate. Esther wouldn’t be spending all of her time going around making people feel awful if she didn’t feel shitty about herself.”
“Maybe she just gets a kick out of being evil.”
“Well, she does, but you have to ask yourself the reasonwhy.”
Ivy set down their tea and brushed off their skirt. “Wish me luck on my Vampiric Magic final. And if luck won’t do it, the answer sheet I stole from Professor Cyrus might do the trick.”
I smiled and shook my head as Ivy strolled away. Some things didn’t change.
