Yep— a real porno for sure. This certainly wasn’t appropriate for a royal affair, but then again the Majestica family weren’t your typical royals, either. I could hear my grandfather chuckling from the nearest table.
“You can’t arrest me!” Marcus panted, and nowhesounded like the one who was in a porno. “I’m the daughter of a chief!”
“Sure you are, and I’m an Emperor’s grandson,” Kallie said sarcastically. This got a big laugh from the audience.
The scene quickly shifted, and all our friends rushed to center stage.
“Order!” Ivy called seductively. “Order in the court!”
Great, now they were a horny judge, too.
“Your honor, my client is innocent,” Opal insisted, playing her part well. “Ava-Marie was never on that boat.”
“Charlie’s the criminal!” Marcus whined, stomping his foot. “You’ll never believe what he did. Your honor, he stole. My. Wallet!”
Ava leaned over to me and whispered, “Well, they got one thing right.”
“Well, we can’t separate you two, and also, we like the sexual tension, so you are both hereby sentenced to the Darke Institute for Supernatural Offenders,” Ivy announced, banging a gavel.
“Anywhere but there!” Marcus feigned dramatically. “I’m too hot for prison!”
Our friends dragged him off, while Kallie took centerstage. “Perhaps this pidge is not as bad as she seems. I feel terribly sorry for her. If only I could understand my feelings, then I could articulate what I feel about her. Sadly, my emotional intelligence is equal to that of a kumquat, so I’ll just ignore what my heart is telling me and misinterpret it as anger. Me punch things, me feel better.”
I sputtered. Okay, I'd been alittleoblivious, but that was pushing the envelope a bit, right?
“I hate him, Oberi,” Marcus whined from her side of the stage. Oberi stomped her foot and gave a loud neigh. “It’s Charlie’s fault we’re in this prison. He’s complete trash.”
Kallie whipped off her leather jacket and spun it around over her head, then tossed it across the room. It smacked me across the face, and I laughed hysterically.
“Who wants to go for a swim?” Kallie cried. “Look at me, all hot and shirtless! My swim trunks don't fit, so that just means you canalmostsee my junk past my happy trail, and I’m too inconsiderate to pull them up!”
“Thoseabs!” Marcus raved to Oberi. “If Charlie’s trash, consider me a raccoon, because I love garbage!”
The crowd completely lost it at that. Ava and I laughed so hard that we were leaning against each other. This was fucking hilarious. They were playing their parts so well.
“Fast forward a few years, and our two star crossed lovers were in a tight predicament,” Alistair narrated. “As the story goes, anyone with Elvish blood at the Institute was taken away, to where, no one knew, by the Warden himself.”
“Boo!” The crowd jeered, and I smirked. Boo indeed.
“The Warden discovered that Charlie had Elvish blood, and there was only one way to save him— through an arranged marriage, conceived by the princess herself!” Alistair announced.
“Charlie, we need to get married so the Warden can’t kidnap you, and that’s theonly reason,” Marcus peeped. “It’s not like I secretly love you or anything.”
“Yeah, I understand. You want to save me, not be with me. At least, that’s what I think, because like I said, feelings are hard for me to read. Or have,” Kallie grunted.
Ava socked me in the arm, and I cringed. That hadn’t been one of my finest moments.
“So marry me!” Marcus cried. “There’s an officiant in the chapel right now. We can get married, and I can pretend that I’m not totally head over heels for you, even though it’s obvious to everyone else!”
“Cool, I guess. I must stay completely rigid, so you can’t understand what’s going on with me and we can fight about it later, like we always do,” Kallie stated.
“It’s so true!” Ava yelped. It sounded like she was crying laughing.
Eddie stood in as Professor Hemlock. “Do you?—?”
“Yes!” Kallie and Marcus both said in unison.
“Then I declare you man and wife,” Eddie said. “You may now kiss the bride.”
