“It feels great,” I said honestly.You’re going to have a hard time getting it off of me, I teased Ava.
Believe me, it won’t take much, she joked back.
It was weird, because I wasn’t the type of guy to wear suits. Put me in a pair of ripped-up jeans and a cotton t-shirt and I was good to go.
Or so I thought, up until this point. As I ran my fingers over the soft fabric, I realized how much Ilikedit. I used to think things like this were over the top and unnecessary, but maybe it wasn’t that I didn’t like nice things. Maybe it was that I’d never had the opportunity to enjoy them before.
That realization hit mehard, and I had to excuse myself from the room as the stylists cleaned up. I exited through the sliding door that led onto the balcony. Sunlight touched my face, and a warm breeze passed through my hair. Even though on some level I enjoyed the pampering and Ilovedthe new suit, my stomach tangled into knots.
Ava wheeled onto the balcony. She must’ve felt that something was off, because she asked, “Don’t you like it?”
I ran my fingers over the railing, because I didn’t know what else to do with my hands. “Yeah, it’s great… it’s just?—”
I cut off as my fingers trailed over various raised bumps engraved onto the railing. At first, I thought they were just pretty designs, until I realized I recognized the patterns. “This railing is engraved with braille,” I remarked in awe.
Ava wheeled even closer. “The builders must’ve left some sort of message for you. What does it say?”
I started on the left side of the balcony and began reading. “It’s a description of the view,” I realized. “It describes the sea, reaching out to the horizon, and the skyscrapers… wow, I didn’t realize the buildings here were so tall. I didn’t know how big Ilamanthe was.”
“It’s pretty big. There are a lot of refugees from all supernatural races here,” Ava said. “I’ve been looking around our room, and I noticed there’s braille embedded in a lot of places, on plaques on the walls and such. This palace was made so you could get around easily, and see it the same way other people can.”
I got choked up and turned away from her. Ava reached out for my hand.
“What’s wrong?” she asked.
“This feels too good to be true,” I admitted. “There’s the food, then the stylists, and now this. Someone cared enough to make this view accessible to someone like me. I’ve never had that kind of equal treatment before. It’s like I’m waiting for the other shoe to drop. There’s still a war going on out there. It’s weird being in this safe, happy place with more resources than I could’ve ever dreamed of, while other people are still out there suffering.”
“You’re not a bad person because other people are suffering and you’re not,” Ava told me.
She understood me far too well, because that wasexactlywhat I was thinking.
“It doesn’t seem fair,” I stated.
“That’s because it isn’t,” Ava said. “But just because someone else is suffering doesn’t mean you have to suffer alongside them to even the scales. Why not indulge in thegood, and then do what you can to make life better for others? Isn’t it more fair if we all have it good, rather than using suffering as some sort of virtue?”
Her words felt heavy, but they lifted a weight off my chest at the same time. “I guess I never saw happiness as something that we could all have. It’s just another limited resource in my world.”
“You can’t think like that,” Ava said. “Happiness isn’t a limited resource that only a few get access to. It’s something that we create— and you know as well as I do that as demigods, we can create whatever the hell we want. Why not joy?”
I sighed heavily. “That’s a relief to think that way. But I’m not sure I can. To me, happiness was always something I had to suffer to achieve, and if I was happy, it meant someone else was suffering.”
“That’s not true,” Ava said. “Happiness isn’t something that you steal from other people so you can make it your own. It can only come from inside of you. Anyone who thinks they have to steal joy from others to feel happy are miserable pieces of shit.”
I smirked. “You’re right. I guess that’s why the Warden’s still out there hurting people, because no matter what he does to make other people suffer, it will never be enough.”
“Exactly,” Ava said. “So don’t feel bad about creating your own happiness in the meantime, because the more you and I can create for ourselves, the more we can share that joy with others.”
“I may be a demigod, but I can’t justcreatehappiness and distribute it to the masses,” I said.
“Why not?” Ava asked. “You can use the power you have, not just as a prince, but as an individual, to help others, and more importantly, help yourself. Because if we all took care of our own needs, the world would be a better place. When you’re full, youcan think clearly and make rational decisions that will keep your people from going hungry, too.”
She was talking about more than just the food. This was like a spiritual hunger that had always been hard for me to satisfy.
“The difference between a good leader and someone like the Warden is that a good leader believes that joy is limitless andeveryoneshould have access to resources,” Ava said. “The Warden doesn’t believe there’s enough to go around. He thinks he has to take those resources away to end suffering, but in the process, he’s created the suffering he says he despises.”
“We aren’t going to be like the Warden,” I stated.
Ava took my hand and squeezed it. “Never.”
