“That sounds impossible to do without any leg movement,” I replied. “I can’t use my legs as momentum to propel myself over.”
“You’ve still got a bit of strength in your hips. You’re gonna have to use it.” Charlie scowled, like he already thought the chances of me pulling this off weren’t high.
“She does that, she’s gonna have to move fast. She doesn’t have a second to make a mistake,” Chancey said.
“What if I only get one hand free?” I asked.
“You start striking,” Charlie said. “Go for the eyes and throat again. If you can, take your hand, find the outline of their windpipe in their throat, and crush it. If they’re not breathing, they can’t hurt you.”
There was silence for a moment, before Chancey asked, “You… okay with doing all this, Ava?”
“I did a lot of this before in Cellblock 9,” I said quietly. “It’s not all that different.”
“You shouldn’t have to, though.” Charlie’s protests were faint, like he considered himself personally responsible if something happened to me, because he’d failed to stop it.
“It’s the world we live in. The Warden and his cronies aren’t willing to play nice.” I grabbed an arrow and held it like a blade. “Let’s practice.”
We rehearsed the self-defense techniques for a little while until I demanded that we try the escape method for pinning. I climbed out of my chair and lowered myself onto an exercise mat until I was flat on my back. Charlie stood at the edge of the mat, hesitating for a beat.
“Well?” I pressed. “Are you going to pin me down, or what, Charlie?”
I couldn’t understand why he was holding back, because I had to learn this shit. It could literally save my life one day.
Chancey leaned over to whisper something to Charlie that I didn’t hear, then nudged him in the ribs. Charlie snapped to attention. He carefully stepped onto the mat, then lowered himself on top of me.
By the ancestors, when his weight pressed into me, his hesitation made all the sense in the world. Every muscle in my body reacted to the memory of his proximity, causing my heart to race— not out of fear of being pinned down, but out of an unsatiated desire to have him close to me once again.
The scent of bergamot surrounded me. His weight was so familiar that a million memories came flooding back through all the senses of my body as passion came springing back to life. My nipples hardened against his muscled chest. Charlie let out a wavered breath. For a moment I swore I could feel his heart rate pulsing across our bond, before remembering that was impossible. He was so close I could sense every heartbeat, and I was sure he could hear mine.
What had I done? I was insane to think I could fight Charlie off, when all I wanted to do now that I had him in this position was drag him closer.
Charlie moved slowly to wrap his fingers around my wrists, applying soft pressure as he lifted my hands over my head to pin them to the mat. My body shuddered beneath him. I hoped he hadn't noticed.
“This okay?” Charlie asked, so gently I could swear the training arena had disappeared around us and we were somewhere else entirely.
Heat pooled between my thighs. For fuck’s sake, it was the most sensation I’d felt below my hips in months. Instinct told me to arch my back and press into him, to let out a moan and beg for his cock to satisfy my aching need. He’d pinned my wrists over my head like this a million times, but we were never in a training arena. We were in bed, tangled between the sheets while he was inside of me and his mouth was fused to mine.
It took everything within me to hold myself back. I couldn’t be sure what I would’ve done if we didn’t have an audience.
“Yeah. It’s…” I couldn’t say perfect. “Fine.”
He remembered, too. There were ghosts in his eyes, but they faded as he murmured, “Get your wrists free, then sweep your arms around and twist me off.”
At least one of us was thinking straight. My head was spinning so fast I’d forgotten I was supposed to be fighting him off.
I didn’t want to push him away, but this wasn’t a game. I had to learn this if I wanted to know how to protect myself. I attempted to yank my wrists out of his hold, but they didn’t budge one bit. It was like trying to drag my arms out of concrete that had already set. Fuck, he was so strong. I wasn’t able to wrench my wrists free. I didn’t know how I could.
I began wriggling my torso to give myself some leverage, which undeniably made my hips move. Instinctively, he sank downward onto me, pressing himself against my body. Without thinking about it, I pushed my hips upward to meet his.
Shit. My mouth ran dry, and I watched as he swallowed. This was all I wanted. Him to make me feel like I was being dominated, while I knew he was fully under my control, trapped within my spell. His skin heated against mine, and my breasts strained against his chest as he held me down. His soft breaths turned into gentle pants, and I was certain mine did too. I pretended not to notice, still doing my best to fight out of his hold.
“Well, Ava’s doing great, so long as she never gets pinned by anyone but you and you’re both in the mood,” Chancey drawled, clearly unimpressed.
Eventually, I gave up. All I was getting as a result of my struggle was frustrated and horny, and that was never a good combination.
“I can’t do it.” I laid there uselessly, figuring if anybody else got me in this position I was done for.
“Get clever,” Charlie said. “What can you do that’s going to force me to let go?”
