Dev threaded their fingers together as Cash shook his headnoand refused the handhold. “I’m tired of the games.”
“Me too.” This time, Dev did walk around Cash, keeping an eye on him to make sure he followed.
Shanna and Joe waited in the inside hallway, each holding up a wall as they hung back. Their frustration at Dev’s disappearance was apparent in their glaring gazes. Dev did something remarkable, shocking Cash. He apologized to each of them as he passed by, promising to do better in the future.
The pieces of their lives were shifting again.
Shanna raised her brow at Cash, who shrugged, “Stay here, be ready. He’s not going to like the next few minutes. Shoot him if he tries to run.” He followed Dev up the stairs, speaking loud enough for Dev to hear.
Every member of the team deserved an explanation. Something more than Cash falling at Dev’s feet, begging for whatever crumbs Dev was willing to give him.
Dev didn’t stop his forward momentum until he came to his bedroom. Cash stood in the doorway, watching as Dev went for each of the cameras inside the room. There were two. He gathered them then dropped both to the floor and stomped on each one with his heavy work boot. They crushed easily under the weight.
“Goddammit,” Cash swore, knowing several thousands of dollars had just been destroyed. He threw his hands in the air. He loved a crazy man who he was going to have to send away. Honestly, he wasn’t sure there was a place far enough away to hide Dev, to keep him safe. He was a menace to himself.
“You’re too volatile. Witness pro—”
Dev cut him off, talking louder than Cash. “We don’t need those cameras anymore. You take care of Keyes for me. Get him out of this and out of the club for that matter. And when this ends, I keep my kids and everything else we talked about before with their birth records, then I’ll give my oath to find your problems in the club. I’ll be all in for your operation. No more games. I’ll handle it.”
A flush rose over his skin, an angry heat spread through his body, swallowing him whole. “You’ve already said you were all in.”
“Did I?” Dev answered, tilting his head as if assessing the situation. “That assumption was on you. Truthfully? I never agreed, no matter what I implied. Not fully. I was ridin’ the line, tryin’ to find a way out.”
Cash’s stomach turned. If he’d had anything to eat today, he might actually have thrown up. Realization crashed against the frustration, leaving a blessed numbness behind. From this point forward, he refused to hold back a single word.
“I’ve given you everything you’ve asked for, and everything I am as a man, and you’ve beenfuckingwith me? Are you serious?”
Dev nodded, coming toward Cash. If it wasn’t a coward’s move, he’d have stepped back to make sure Dev kept his distance. Instead, he flung out his arm, his hand shoving against Dev’s chest. The biker did what he asked and stopped, only slightly crowding him.
“I know you’ve given me everything. I was there with you until the night you took me down. I wanted to commit that evenin’. That’s what I was tryin’ to do before it all went to hell. Shit, I’m still there with you right now. I can’t shake you from my head. You’re always there, helpin’ me keep my shit together. I just don’t like bein’ fucked with. And you fuckin’ fucked with me more than anything or anyone else in my life, and that says a lot because people really like to shit on me. In those first few days we were together, I liked the world you pretended to create with me.” Dev paused then narrowed his eyes and added, “Honestly, my behavior’s as much on you as it is on me.”
It took several seconds to decipher what Dev was saying. Cash’s mouth opened then closed. He shook his head. “I didn’t pretend. I never pretended. I broke all the rules for you. I continue to break the rules for you. I told you…”
Dev’s strong palm covered Cash’s hand still keeping Dev at bay. He curled his fingers around Cash’s hand, using force to bring his hand to Dev’s lips. He placed a tender kiss on Cash’s palm.
“Today, while I was watchin’ Keyes, I saw a version of you and me. I don’t know if we can get there. I’m not as docile as Keyes, and I don’t think you’re as patient as Alec. We have real danger headed our way. But we can try if you still want to. I’m all in. I’m a narc. There’s my oath.”
The heavy weight of sudden defeat blanketed Cash. A small part of him wanted to throw Dev’s words in the garbage where they belonged, but every other fiber in his body had him closing his eyes, letting Dev’s explanation matter.
Dev still didn’t crowd or talk over him. He only waited. Cash’s heart ached, wanting him to accept the simple declaration that truly made sense.
How could he?
He’d welcomed Dev inside his body last night, making love with him until his thighs and legs quivered, barely able to walk from the bed. The entire time, Cash gave his undying devotion. Every second had apparently been a game to Dev.
“Whatever you’re thinkin’, stop,” Dev said and took the step separating them. “Give me a chance to prove what I’m sayin’ is the truth.”
“Where were you today?” Cash asked, his voice raw and husky. He started to move away, to get distance, but Dev’s arm shot out, circling his waist, yanking him forward. Rather than release his hand, Dev threaded their fingers together.
“Third floor of the parkin’ garage catty-corner to the Dallas jail. My old man found out about Keyes’s dude through a contact at the jailhouse. I volunteered to stake it out, to see what was what then report back to him with a big fat lie. It wasn’t even hard for me to lie to my old man. Then when I was there, watchin’ everywhere, I began to see you and me in Keyes and Alec. I saw how it could work between us. I saw a future, one I liked a whole lot. I don’t know how to get there, if we can even get there…” Dev took a breath but his gaze never wavered from Cash’s. “If any of my brothers find out what I’ve done, I’ll die that very day. But we can try.”
Cash closed his fingers around Dev’s. His oath meant everything. “No one’s going to find out. Only limited people know about your involvement. I’ll protect you. But you can’t go without me. I can’t be your shield if I don’t know what you’re doing or where you are. I should’ve been there with you today.”
“Understood. At the time, my old self was questionin’ shit. I decided I could sneak around better by myself because you’re so big and pretty. People see you. I probably won’t make that decision again, but if I do, I’ll give you the heads-up.” Dev kissed Cash’s lips. “I sure kiss on you a lot. I haven’t ever done that before. So do we have a deal? You got Keyes for me? I don’t need the dough. Just Keyes and Abi and Mae.”
Cash paused, staring at Dev before he said, “Yeah.” Nodding once. “We have a deal if you agree we’re a team from this moment forward, no matter what. You move one step and I know.”
“Vice versa,” Dev easily promised, nodding. “Tell me I haven’t ruined any chance of those three words you said to me losin’ their meanin’. That wasn’t my intention. I just get this tunnel vision sometimes…”
What held Cash’s tongue was the rawness of his feelings. He’d broken through his own natural reserves, uttering words of love and forever devotion that shouldn’t have been muttered so soon. He’d put himself out there, over and over again. He’d thought Dev had been there with him too then… He released a pent-up sigh as he bent his forehead to Dev’s, changing the course of his words.
“…It’s all right. I’ve fucked it up, but I’ll be workin’ to hear them again. And it seems like I need to add the condition of you in there. I want you with me like we’ve been. It’s nonnegotiable for me.” Dev’s brow furrowed as if he were contemplating an alternative and didn’t like the options.
“You didn’t mess anything up. Those feelings are all still here,” Cash whispered. A comfortable silence held between them before he said, “I love you. I always have, and I’m afraid I always will. Tell me the truth, and I’ll believe you, for better or worse… are you fully in?”
“All the way in.” Dev answered in a hushed breath. The sincerity pushed into every syllable made Cash wonder if maybe Dev was answering all the meanings of his question. Before he could give more thought to that, Dev tilted his chin up to press another kiss to Cash’s lips, sealing their deal. Chaos might be barreling down on them but at least, for right this minute, they were in this together.
