Somewhere between honey and marry, my mind went blank, and I felt faint. Grabbing him to stay upright, I’m righted as he bends down to look me in the eyes. “I love you,” he says with the biggest smile on his face.
When the world comes rushing back, I look at all the people closing in to congratulate us while the thunderous applause almost hurts my ears. Gregory kisses my cheek, then whispers in my ear, “Smile.”
And that’s when I realize they’re all one and the same. Him. My father. And I have no doubt his father as well.
I pull myself away, feeling him hot on my heels as I hurry to the hallway to find my coat. It’s time. I’m leaving and never looking back. Yanked as soon as I hit the shadows under the stairs, I’m turned around so fast that I wobble on my heels.Pressing against my arm, Gregory holds me by the arm so tight that I find myself lifting on my tiptoes. To the side of my head, he asks, “What do you think you’re doing?”
“You’re hurting me.”
His breath is labored, each exhale a huff against my shoulder. “Are you going to calm down?”
I’m not calm in the least, but I’m in no position to fight my way out of this without causing a scene that I don’t want to be a part of. “I am calm.” He releases me, and I sidestep to catch my balance. “What are you doing? Marriage wasn’t a part of the agreement.” I throw my arms out to the sides of my body. “We’re not even really dating.”
“You aren’t. But I’ve been so fucking committed to you, Sosie, and you treat me like dirt.”
“I don’t treat you like dirt. I was treating you like a friend, but that’s not enough, is it?”
“No. It’s not. Not anymore.”
When I lower my arms, the giant diamond on my ring finger catches what little light there is back here. Shock brings me to a standstill—my thoughts, my body, my entire soul leaves my body from the sight of it.
I blacked out. When I came to, I was engaged? I reach to take it off, but Gregory grabs my hands. “Please. I’m sorry.” Holding my hands tighter in his, he says, “If you just keep it on tonight, I’ll figure out a plan to announce the engagement is off next week. Please, Sosie. Do me this favor.”
“Do you this favor?” I pull my hands free and waggle my fingers in front of his face. “Pretend we’re engaged when we’re not?” I puff out a deep breath and look at his coworkers celebrating. Some people come toward us but detour up the stairs to the other event being hosted here. When we’re alone again, I ask, “Why would you do that, Gregory? Why would youask me to marry you when you know I don’t feel the same about you?”
“Because I truly believe we aren’t so far apart in our feelings. We just need to give the time for yours to grow some more.”
“More?” I drop my head, wondering when I entered the upside-down-backward dimension of my life. “You hurt me. You grabbed my arm.” I look at him. “That was intentional, and now you want me to do you a favor? I don’t even feel safe with you anymore.”
“I’m so sorry. Please. I got upset?—”
“I’m the only one who has a right to be upset between the two of us.” The gall. The arrogance. The utter insult. “I’ve been pretending my entire life. I won’t pretend for you.”
I push past him, needing air to help clear my head and cool the anger storming inside me. As soon as I walk back out, my hand is grabbed by Jerilyn. “There you are.” She hugs me so tight, I feel trapped in her bony arms. “Congratulations.” Releasing me, she says, “Let me see that ring.” She holds my hand up. “Oh my Lord. That is . . . wow.” She takes me by the hand again and pulls me like a rag doll. “We must show Jennifer from marketing. She’ll never get over this.”
Glancing back over my shoulder, Gregory comes from the hallway looking like a kid who just had his favorite toy stolen. I won’t feel bad for him. I can’t. I’m suddenly engaged to a man I would have never said yes to if he’d asked privately. That’s what this is about. A public spectacle to guilt me into it.
He’s so easily distracted by a group of guys shoving a drink in his hand that I’m quickly forgotten. Is this what it was about? Being a big man in their eyes when the bonuses would have sufficed.
With the gaggle of women around meoohingandaahingover a ring I had nothing to do with, I look up to find the only man I ever cared about embracing another woman.
My heart stops.
My hand covers my mouth to keep the gasp inside.
My eyes lock on his as he stares back at me.
I’ve had dreams of this happening, another casual run-in at the subway, quippy conversation that led to confessions of the one who got away, midnight kisses, and getting a second chance with Keats to start again.
But as the other woman holds him like she’s his, his eyes dip to my hand and the damn ring wrapped around my finger.And my world falls apart again.
CHAPTER 16
KEATS
Stepping out of the tight embrace, I lower my head to pinch the bridge of my nose. I know she’s not real, but this happens sometimes.
Sosie’s become a figment of my imagination. I once sat across from her at the ramen restaurant we visited. That was real. The other time I went, I swear I could see her smile and hear her laughter like we were together that time, too. The illusion was ruined when the bill was set in front of me, with only a meal for one listed.
