See? There had definitely been drugs involved.
And Thomas was nowhere to be seen.
“Hey!” Huw stood up and met me halfway across the room. Hugs. We always hugged. But now he was half dragging me over, and poor Noah was just standing there.
“Look who’s back from the dead!” Huw shouted at the table as people cheered.
Where I would have normally played along with their jolliness, I was standing there holding my hand out to Noah. Wanting him to come with me. For what reason, I couldn’t have told you, I just…
I wanted him. With me. Perhaps to show off. Maybe to settle the horrible feeling in my stomach where the ground felt like it was dropping under my screaming feet.
Trying to stand on my socked foot, the other one bare, in borrowed clothes with his kisses still bruising my skin, I stood there, and then he turned around as if to leave.
“Sit down, Riley,” someone shouted, pulling up a chair for me.
He was walking away, and I wanted to scream. Shout. And my head whipped around to find his mum, wanting her to intervene. Make him stop. He was running away again; I could feel it in my bones, and I hated it. Hated that I had done this to myself, again, and that I was messing up something I never should have started. What was I doing? I had no clue. Instead, my arse got plonked down on the chair, and Huw was yapping on in my ear and all I wanted to do was scream.
“Are you okay?”
Huw. Shaking me, like I’d zoned out again. I did this. Everything was too much right now, and I was in pain. My foot, yes, but my head? Everything?
“Yeah, yeah,” I huffed out. “Where did Noah go?”
“Who?” He looked concerned. Like I’d made all this up in my head. And now, finally, his mum was moving and walking away, and everyone was talking and I couldn’t understand how I’d got myself in this state.
“Noah?” I said weakly. “Why are his parents sitting at this table?”
“Oh, we’ve bonded.” Huw laughed, and now Simon was next to me on the other side, talking far too fast and too hushed for me to grasp everything.
“And then Jordyn threw a hissy fit and stormed off, and he was on the first boat out this morning, and then Thomas left to go find him, and they both got back about an hour ago, and we’re all dying to find out what on earth has gone on. I went to bed early, you see. I missed all the drama lastnight. First you disappear, then Thomas and Jordyn cause drama, and now you’re back, and where has that handsome man of yours disappeared off to?”
Well, here I was, behaving like an owl, my head spinning around the room, scanning for the only thing I wanted right now.
It had been one hell of a day. One day and two fucks and suddenly I had become this? Clingy and desperate when he was probably back in his room, getting the bed cleaned up and thanking his lucky stars he finally got rid of me.
“I don’t know.” I sighed as a glass of wine was placed in my hand.
“Well.” Huw smiled. “A good time was had by all, it seems. You’ve lost your shoes and one sock, and that’s one hell of a hickey on your neck.”
“Hey,” I warned, having regained some of my senses, as Derek luckily missed that incredibly insensitive comment about his son’s…antics with…me. At least his dad was still here, which gave me hope.
“So what happened to Thomas?” I asked, letting myself take a gulp of wine. I needed something. Anything to stop me feeling this weird.
“Jordyn made a new friend.” Simon winked. “Thomas wasn’t impressed.”
“Oh.” I half-heartedly rolled my eyes, wondering why this small piece of gossip wasn’t making my heart sing. Instead, I was indifferent. Shockingly so.
“And there was shouting. It was almost entertaining.”
“Simon may have been clapping at one point.” Huw grinned.
“Over what?” I was just talking here, still scanning the room.
“He’ll be back.” Simon gently patted my arm. “Have a drink.”
I did. I downed the whole glass. Stupid, perhaps.
No. It was definitely stupid. And irresponsible, and here I went again. Right down stupidity lane. Head first. My heart once again shattered into a million pieces, and I had no clue how I’d ended up here again.
