“No, Merc, I don’t think it’s anything to do with that. You were never chatty. You and Aunt Maris spoke when you needed to speak. You showed love in a lot of different ways. Mostly non-wordy ways.”
“Hey! I talk!”
“I know, I know. Look, I know if I ever need anything, you’ll be there. There’s nothing about you that’s ‘wrong,’ Merc. You have your friends. You have me. If you haven’t met the right woman, it’s not because you’re a taciturn loner who doesn’t know how to communicate with people. Or something like that.”
“You might be making things worse,” I sigh. “You might be making things better. I can’t tell. Also—taciturn, Mr. Dictionary? You show off.”
“I was going to say grumpy-ass, but—”
“Ah! Put a dollar in the jar, Calder. And come and get your boys. I’m pooped,” Janet calls.
“I’m not grumpy!”
“That’s why I didn’t say it. That, and not wanting to get busted for cursing. You’re not grumpy. That would imply you’re in a bad mood. You’re not, are you?”
Not all the time. I’m just not... happy.“It’s hard to be cheerful when you keep wanting something and every time you look around, you see someone else who has it. Half the time, they have it, and they take it for granted. This girl that I work with... Admittedly, she’s young, but her boyfriend broke up with her. Over a text message.”
“Ow.”
“Yes! And one minute she was bawling on my chest, saying she loved him and she hated him, and the next, she wanted us to pose for pictures to send to him, to make him jealous.” I rub my forehead. “Human relationships...”
“Ah ah ah. Krakens have a sordid love’em and leave ‘em history, and you know that. That whole descendants of the gods who couldn’t keep it in their togas.”
“I havea millennium of strikes against me, and humans have the same.”
“And despite literally thousands of strikes in our collective pasts, we find love. We find the one who makes it all work. You won’t make those selfish, stupid mistakes, Mercer. Okay? Have a little faith in yourself.”
“I’m trying,” I sigh. “Thank you for the pep talk.”
“Anytime—except this minute. I have to go. Your nephews are outmaneuvering their mama. Dad to the rescue!”
I smile. Dad to the rescue.
Icould be the one coming to the rescue all the time, but it won’t be as a father, or a husband, or even a lover. Just a lifeguard. It’s noble work, but I don’t think it’s enough to satisfy the empty spot in my heart.
“Night, Calder. Hug the boys and Janet for me.”
I hang up and put the phone and my other belongings back in the locker before sliding across the beach and down to the water, tentacles leaving curving tracks in the sand.
Well. At least tomorrow will be better, I tell myself.Samantha won’t sob on me. Or call me an ‘old guy.’
Stupid teenage breakups. Not mature enough for a lifetime of love. Why, in our clan’s tradition, we could be separated by miles of ocean, by continents, even, and we’d never, ever...
I stop ranting in my head and shake myself as I glide deep into the water, heading towards the little lair I’ve made.
Man. I really am a grumpy-ass.
Chapter Three: Madelyn
I have my own yard. My own yard, and my own house—thanks to the money my parents gave me for the down payment. I wipe away a twinge of guilt and shove away the nagging thoughts that still assault me.
If Eli and I had stayed together, we could have bought this place. We would have saved so much if I hadn’t had to take him to court for child support. If, if, if.
Nope. It’s a beautiful June day in Harmony Glen, and I have a beautiful yard to walk through, with a little fence around it so I can let Zack play out here while I work on my laptop nearby. So I can take tons of Mommy Breaks, as he calls them, to join in the playtime. Only now, it won’t be confined to the tiny living room of our apartment, and I won’t have to constantly tell him “just a little longer, Mommy has to get back” when we’re at the park.
“I think I made the right decision,” I announce to the world at large and my cup of crappy instant coffee.
My phone buzzes in the pocket of my dilapidated robe, the one that went through maternity, post-partum, and almost three years of single parenting. The stains on this thing are legendary.
