Chapter 6: Sefina
I can’t fire at all of the Welvirs that charge at us. There are too many, and my head feels so heavy that I can’t hold it up any longer. The agony is a thousand icy pokers in my brain, demanding my attention, blotting my vision, and thrusting me into panic overload.
The stabbing sensations down my spine are unbearable. I need medicine, but I can’t speak through the raking picks splitting my thoughts.
And finally, the world falls into the ink of unconsciousness—a dangerous place to be unless I’m sheltered or alone. I am neither.
My body is at risk in the waking realm. But the familiar numbing heat of medicine laces notes of woody comfort through my head, pushing back the signals. I’m grateful for the relief and slip away to dreamless silence where not even the blue silhouettes of life can find me.
Sometimes, the grip of the sleep feels like it might be the end. I never trust myself to wake up. Now and then, I want it to be how I leave this universe. I’m tired of fighting with no end in sight. And I don’t want to worry about finding more naclyron root to keep the migraines away.But, as Mother would say, if I have a spark in my heart, I must fight for those lost in the dark.I cannot give in just yet.
I wish she was here. She would know how to help.
Poppy must’ve found me.
I ease out of the numbness of sleep and sense something warm around me. It’s easy to pretend I’m somewhere safe when I’m warm. Space is so cold. Hunter and junker ships are always iced over. The enemy ships, the Titan tunnels…everything wants to freeze my tits off.
A deep rumbling pressure surrounds me, shifts beneath me, and moves me. I still can’t control my body. It’s heavy, feverish, and won’t let me wake up.
“Leave,” a sinister voice says in long, wavering tones.
I can’t seem to lift my eyelids. My mind is fuzzy, and listening is still a struggle. But I want to know what’s going on.
The shimmer of a Titan shape emerges in my thoughts. They’re close. Too close. Another stands behind me. I feel them like a soft fingertip to my brain. Beside them is a human.
“This will wake her,” a woman says.
The Titan closest to me growls. Its image shudders and pulses with the sound, making me wince and want to shy away. But I can’t. I am stuck in the Haze. My grandmother would be so disappointed. She trained me better.
But I am different from all of them now.
“I do not want her to wake up until she is ready.”
“Then you must carry her.”
“Fine!”
“Savage wants you on patrol. You can’t do both.”
“Give someone else a rotation. I will work two shifts when she wakes. Doubt she will want me around, anyway.”
I know the voice, but I can’t grasp the name.Wake up. I need to wake up!
But I have not properly slept in weeks. My body finally has control, and it’s taking what it needs.
“What is this on the back of her head?” the closest Titan asks. His words shudder through my aching body. A tender touch glides up the back of my neck and stops just at the edge of a sore spot I’ve had for years.
“Oh, no,” a new male voice mumbles. The beeps of a scanner zing around in my mind, making my eyes water. “We need to do surgery right now. When was the last dose?”
“Poppy gave it to her six hours ago.”
“Give her another bite, under the tongue. She should wake in another four to six hours. We will do what we can for now.”
What does that mean?
Someone moves my head and slips warm fingers and a small piece of root under my tongue. My head rolls back. I can’t stop it. A large hand corrals me upright, and I get a glimpse of who holds me.
Concern pinches their battle-weary, blood-spattered face. Inhuman red eyes meet mine. There’s no anger in them, only fear.
