Now, I am a shattered male stuck in Shifter form, living on fish from the river. I have not gone home like Zorin asked.
A day has passed since he left. The silence is more peaceful now. I’m not tense and looking around every treetrunk and boulder, expecting to encounter him at any moment. He isn’t around to see me fall apart. And I finally feel like I can…because he’s gone.
Wolves don’t cry. But I lay out on a rock in the sun and let go. Only my body’s inherent functions keep me breathing.
If you are still among us, goddess, take me. End me. Stop my heart. Send a venomous snake to bite me. Smite me from the skies like my mate. My son does not need me. My brother thinks he can heal what will always be broken.
For hours, I do not move.
Something sharp pokes me.
“Is he dead?”
I beg for it now.
A teenager taps my nose with the branch. I crack open an eye and growl at them, wishing to be left alone to die. Three teens flee on all fours, heading south toward their pack in the valley below.
When I rest my head back, I’m greeted by a little blue bird.
Leave me, or I’ll eat you.
The bird chirps and flutters around, taking a dust bath in a divot of the rock.
Ugh. I can’t even get a day to die in peace.The happiness of the creature disgusts me, so I get up and sulk off to the creek. I’m trying to decide if I want to drink to try drowning myself when the little bird lands on my head.
What is your problem?
I swipe at it with a paw. It just flutters out of the way then flies up the creek and back to me.
Fine. Show me whatever it is that’s so important that I can’t be allowed to die today.
I follow the bird as it flies up the hillside and lands beside a small blue egg that has fallen from a nest into a bed of moss. It chirps and hops around the egg then flies up to a branch and down again.
I cannot help you. My paws are too big.The bird repeats its pattern of hopping, circling its nest, then dropping down again.
It is a familiar pain, one that I could solve in this situation. But I don’t want to let go of my anger yet. Neither does my Shifter.
As I turn to walk away, a gust of wind curls up in my face out of nowhere. It pelts my body and tugs at my ears. It cannot come from a natural place. I am certain it is our goddess, and she is pissed at me.
Why can’t I just be left alone to grieve?I roar with all my frustration.
A root moves in the dirt, catching my foot, and sending me toppling into the ground. As I lie in agonizing emptiness and misery, I look up at the blue sky, a thin haze of clouds over it—a perfect match to Jezza’s eyes. I don’t know if it’s her spirit or the goddess’ that is mad at me. Likely both. But it calms my Shifter and knocks me back into humanoid form.
It takes a moment to get my bearings back, to sit up and crawl on my hands and knees to the little blue egg. I gather it up with a bit of extra moss, knowing it’s what the spirits of Mindor want. Then I climb the tree with one arm and settle the egg back in the nest, adding a bit of moss to ensure it does not tumble free again.
The little bird seems happy.
I am not.
I do not like handling delicate things.
As I cling to the tree, a flash of light down in the hills catches my attention. After a moment, it leaves. But movement in the trees makes me think someone is out there.
I jump out of the tree. By the time I’ve hit the ground, I’m on all fours again.
It’s been a long time since I’ve been on a decent hunt. With Zorin busy picking a mate, I am the only one in this section of the mountains capable of protecting them. And something about this light has my hackles raised and my nerves pinned.
Perhaps the goddess is not done with me yet and the bird was merely a distraction to get me up here so I could see the bigger problem. She always has worked in mysterious ways.
