“Dumbass,” I muttered.
“Wait. What?” His eyes went wide as he stared at me and tried to make sense of what I said.
I shook my head and let out a brittle chuckle. “I couldn’t do it any more than you could.”
My eyes closed, and I took a deep breath. “Believe me, I thought about it plenty. Hell, even now, I know it’s the right thing to do.”
I bit my lip, looked down at him, and shook my head.
Nate slowly reached up and tugged at my hands, which still gripped my upper arms, and pulled me gently, just enough so I took the couple of steps needed to close the distance between us. His hands rubbed up and down my arms, a look of wonder on his face as he stared up at me.
I knew what he was thinking, because I’d been thinking the same thing ever since I woke up alone in my bed after our confrontation.
That we’d never have this again.
Never touch, never kiss, never love.
But there we were, and it was right there for us, if we were brave, or stupid, enough to reach out and take it.
He let go of my hands and went to my hips, gently easing me down so I straddled his thighs, watching me for any sign of pain or hesitance. But there was none. Nothing ever felt more right than being with him, as crazy as it sounded.
“What does this mean, little bird? I need you to be very clear and very plain about what you want.” His words were slow and his caress on my hips and lower back was soft and soothing.
“I… I don’t know how we can make this work. But I love you, Daddy, and know I can’t turn you in.” I shook my head.
“But I’m a cop, and I don’t know how I can go to work every day knowing what I know.” My words were soft and anguished.
A thought struck me and I glanced up at him, surprised I hadn’t put the pieces together before. “Wait. That cop. Whenwe had our first movie date. That wasn’t really about sleeping with his closeted son, was it?”
Nate let out a laugh. “Actually, it was. Trust me. No one is as surprised as me, with how much he hated me and was hell-bent on ruining my life, that he didn’t discover my secret.”
I hummed in response. “Dumb luck, I guess. Just like it took so long for the cop you were sleeping with to put the pieces together.”
He brought my hands up to his lips and kissed the knuckles. “I worried every day that it would be the last time I would see you.”
The pained look on his face was too much. “So, what do we do?”
We didn’t have many options. But I couldn’t let him go to jail. I couldn’t lose him.
“We could leave,” he suggested, his warm palms blazing a path of heat and love everywhere they touched. “Fly away with me, little bird.”
I scoffed at the suggestion, but his eyes told me how serious he was. Swallowing my words, I considered him.
“How? Where would we go?”
I shook my head, reality crashing down on me. “I can’t leave my parents. After what they went through before, I couldn’t disappear on them. Not again.”
A heavy sigh escaped my lips as I leaned forward and put my head on Nate’s chest.
“You could just quit your job. We could stay here for a while, and then go.”
When I went to interject, he put a hand over my mouth and continued. “I don’t mean run away. We can plan a move, maybe in six months or so. But you wouldn’t be able to tell anyone but your parents.”
He let out a sigh. “Eventually, though, we would have tomove on to somewhere more permanent, butno onewould be able to know about that.”
Was that something I could do? Could I give up my job?
“I can’t just quit my job, Daddy. I have a mortgage and bills to pay.” While I would have loved to give in to his idea, it wasn’t feasible. Though, that didn’t mean I couldn’t start looking for a new job right away.
