It’s all bullshit when it comes to Gage Hollis. He doesn’t know manners if they bit him in the ass, so screw him.
Screw Gage Hollis.
I’m done with him.
twelve
Gage
What the hell is wrong with me?
I’ve never been the guy who just ups and leaves someone like that.
Not like I left Sloane.
Half-dressed.
Standing there like she didn’t matter.
The image won’t get out of my head, no matter how hard I try to shove it down.
The way she looked at me—
not angry.
not even surprised.
Just…hit.
AndI did that.
I walked out like it didn’t cost me anything, like she didn’t deserve more than that.
The second the barn doors closed behind me, the regret hit so hard it nearly dropped me to my knees.
But I didn’t go back.
I kept walking.
And that might be the worst part of it.
I didn’t want to face anyone because of the shame I felt. All I cared about was getting out of there, but the regret hit almost immediately. The problem was I was already halfway gone, and I couldn’t take it back.
I hid in my bedroom and even avoided going downstairs out of fear of running into her. I still can hear the way the door creaked and closed, the slow ascent up the stairs, and shuffling to the bedroom across the hall where she sleeps.
Her usual assured, confident stride is gone—replaced by something slower. Heavier.
And I know I’m the reason for it.
But just because I feel guilty for how I left things doesn’t mean I trust her. She’s clearly learning things, but even if that is the case, where is her proof? Her words aren’t enough. I want to believe she’s being honest, but it’s just too hard to imagine.
Every woman I’ve let close has found a way to show their true colors, and those colors are muddy and dark.
By morning, the guilt hasn’t settled, but my job doesn’t stop simply because I feel like crap for what I did. Avoidance is the only thing I choose—because facing her right now would mean admitting how badly I failed her. And, I know what led to it.
The anger-fueled conversation, the constant bickering, and the complete disregard of my authority really got under my skin. To be clear, though, I don’t want to control Sloane; I don’t even want her to change who she is, but what I do want is for her to recognize how difficult this all is for me.
I’m not used to working alongside someone who inadvertently controls my livelihood. What she does with her side of things will drastically alter my life, and I’ve never liked having my life in someone else’s hands.
