A smile flickers across her mouth. “You already know I’m going to say yes.”
I smile back, then sit up straight. “How much do you know about vampires and... feeding?”
Her eyes widen, just a bit, like she’s surprised but trying to control her facial expression. But then she turns fully to face me, teacup cradled in her lap. “I know a bit. Is there something specific you want to know about?”
I want to know everything about it: what it feels like, what happens during the feeding, what comes after. But I try to focus on one thing at a time. “Is it... dangerous?”
Poppy studies me, her lavender eyes narrowed just slightly, like she’s deciding how best to say what’s going through herhead. Then she says, “It can be, depending on the vampire. But it’s not inherently dangerous.”
I hold her gaze, waiting for more.
With a smile, she sets her teacup on the side table, then folds her hands in her lap. “Feeding is intimate. It’s emotional and physical. And there’s a biological response. A vampire’s fangs produce venom, which relaxes the body and heightens sensations. It can soften the line between pain and pleasure. But the vampire needs to be disciplined, and there has to be trust.”
Heat creeps up my neck, but I don’t say anything.
Heightens sensations.
I know what that feels like.
Every time I’m around Severin, my magic reacts to him, like he’s a conduit of some sort. Sometimes all it takes is a brief glance, meeting his eyes for just a moment, and my entire body suddenly feels like a storm waiting to erupt.
No one has ever made me feel like that before.
Poppy tips her head and blinks her big lavender eyes. “Why do you ask?”
She knows exactly why I’m asking, but I appreciate that she’s letting me put it into my own words.
After a moment of hesitation, I say, “Because I’m considering it... with Severin.”
She nods slowly, not looking surprised. “Do you trust him?”
It takes no time at all to ponder that question. I know it in the way my body softens when I’m around him, in the way I always want to step closer to him instead of away.
“Yes.” I glance down into my teacup. “I’m not afraid of him. But I’m afraid of how much I want him.”
When I look up, Poppy is smiling at me. “I know what that feels like. I was afraid of how much I liked Aric too.” She reaches up to fiddle with a strand of hair, rubbing it between her forefinger and thumb. “I didn’t want to get hurt. But... I’m glad I took the leap, even if I was afraid.”
I’m glad she took the leap too. Both she and Aric are better for it, even if they didn’t realize it at the time.
“I still haven’t made my decision,” I say, my voice almost lost in the hiss and crackle of the fire.
Now Poppy is the one who leans forward to put a hand on my leg. “You don’t have to decide right away. But whatever you choose to do, I’ll support you.”
I put my hand on top of hers and squeeze. “Thanks, Pops. That means a lot.”
Later that night, after Alina and Lyra have returned and we’ve all gone to bed, I lie awake, staring up at the shadowed ceiling.
My mind flashes through memories of Severin, snippets of conversation, stolen moments that I wish would’ve lasted forever. It makes my body warm and my heart beat just a bit faster in my chest.
Isis uncurls herself from where she was coiled on my chest and slithers slowly up my body to rest her head on the dip between my collarbones. During the winter, it’s easy for her toget cold, so she’s almost always curled up against my body or tucked into the blankets on my bed.
“Your heart is restless,” she hisses softly.
In the dark, I nod. Then I whisper, keeping my voice down so as not to wake the others, “I’m thinking.”
“About him?”
I don’t have to answer that. Isis already knows.
