“Doubtful,” I say, slipping my feet into my checkered Vans sneakers.
Neither of us talks while we finish getting ready. The sound of blow dryers makes it a little hard to hold a conversation, but I think about what she said.
I’m honestly not interested in being with anyone. I know where my heart is even if I won’t admit it out loud. I just also know I can’t be with him. Not when I’m still such a mess.
Going on a date might help me get over our—it feels weird to call it a breakup, but I guess that’s what it is. A date might help me move on from that. From him.
Sooner or later, Gabriel is going to be with somebody else. He’s a twenty-something year old college athlete. Girlfriend or not, it’s not like he’d be celibate. What guy in his position would?
Has he slept with anyone else since we … I swallow hard. Okay. So, a date. Not the worst idea. If I can muster up the courage to actually go. A shiver snakes down my spine. The thought of being alone with a guy I don’t know is not my idea of a good time.
My heart races, and my palms get sweaty the longer I think about it.
Nope. I’m going to take it back. Going on a date isn’t something I can do.
“Dating isn’t in the cards for me,” I tell her. “At least not anytime soon.”
“That’s fine,” she says, unperturbed as she leads me outside to the parking lot. “But eventually, you’re going to need to learn to live your life. The fear isn’t going to go away. You have to accept it and do the scary thing anyway. That’s the only way you’ll get past it.”
I really wish she was wrong.
9GABRIEL
“Is she going to come inside?” Felix asks as he peers through the blinds of our front window.
“Get away from there,” I snap, shoving him away from the window before Cecilia notices him and loses her nerve.
“Why is she standing on the sidewalk? Just go get her and bring her inside.”
I fight the urge to smack him upside the head and instead say, “She’ll come inside when she’s ready.” At least, I hope she does. Fuck. It’s been a solid five minutes already, and she doesn’t look any closer to climbing the porch steps than she did when she first arrived. I’m worried she’ll change her mind about working on our project today. That she’ll turn around and leave without bothering to come inside. It’s aggravating. Especially since this time around, her reluctance isn’t because of the rest of the guys living here. At least I don’t think it is. This time, I’m pretty sure her hesitation is because of me.
I sigh.
“Who are you guys talking about?” Deacon asks as he jogs down the stairs, Atticus right beside him. Those two clicked right away, which is good. Maybe they can keep one another out of trouble. Not that Atticus is the rebellious type. Deacon, on the other hand, I guess we’ll have to wait and see.
So far, since moving in, he’s been on his best behavior. Shows up to practice on time, doesn’t miss any classes. He cleans up after himself around the house and does dishes, even when not all of them are his. He’s a model roommate. Until now.
“You two can’t be down here,” I tell them.
The four of us all together in a confined space is too much for her. Cecilia was only just starting to warm up to Felix and Julio prior to our split. With Deacon and Atticus added to that mix?—
“Chill,” Atticus says. “We’re just grabbing drinks before we hole up in our rooms.”
My shoulders relax.
“Even though we’re starving,” Deacon adds.
I wave them off. “Then grab a snack. What are you two, toddlers?”
“Take it easy,” Felix says, peering out the window again. I can’t help but look over his shoulder and— shit.
“Go. Go. Go. She’s coming.” I shove him toward the stairs.
“What’s the big deal?” he complains. “Cecilia likes me.”
“Good for you,cabrón.”— Fucker—There’s a knock at the door. “I need her to like me, not be distracted by you.”
He grins.Asshole.“Not my fault I’m more popular with the ladies.”
