Yes…
“No,” she said sharply. “I donotlike to feel as if I am about to see my name in the scandal sheets.”
He nodded slowly and took another half step in her direction. “I mean you no harm, Evelyn. Perhaps, if you tell me, I can help you. You must be in search of a husband too, are you not?”
She could not answer, for any attempt to speak got stuck halfway up her throat. Why did he have to be so close? It only served to conjure memories of his embrace in Hyde Park, how safe she had felt with his arm around her, how protected. It was not a common feeling for her.
Trying to steady her breathing, she made the mistake of looking deeper into his unusual eyes. Even her heartbeat seemed to fail her as she got lost in those blue pools, finding none of the deceit or trickery that she had expected to see. Instead, there was just a glimmer of inquisitiveness, his expression warm and inviting, making herwantto tell him.
The sooner you speak, the sooner you can leave and get a grip of yourself.
She cleared her parched throat. “I want someone… who will be honest with me. Someone who does not deceive or play games.” Her breath shuddered out of her. “I want someone who would not be afraid to show that I am loved and that… I am important. I want someone who would never, not for a moment, dream of making me feel small.”
It was the truth, though she had never said it aloud before. Those were private prayers that she muttered under her breath at night when the rest of the house was asleep and no one could mock her for it. Those were the secret wishes that she made whenever she found an eyelash on her cheek or saw two magpies together or passed by a fairy ring of mushrooms or caught sight of the first star in the sky.
As of yet, they had gone unanswered.
Hugo seemed taken aback by her admission as he halted his approach and tilted his head, observing her as if she were some strange creature. Fresh heat burned in her cheeks, but it was not because of the way he was looking at her; rather, it was anticipation of the teasing she was about to receive.
I have said too much. I should have kept it to myself.
“But… that is too simple,” he said, at last. “That is nothing at all.”
Relieved that it was not outright mockery, she shrugged her shoulders. “Maybe it is simple, but it is also so very rare.”
Dropping her chin to her chest and crossing her arms as if she could pull her secrets back into herself, she turned on her heel and hurried for the door. Of all the people she could have told, Hugo was the last person she had expected to reveal her prayers to.
She paused on the threshold and tossed back over her shoulder, “Congratulations on your success with Selina. I hope it continues.”
With that, she left, grateful to find that the hallways were empty and her reputation would survive another encounter with Hugo.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
Evening had long fallen across the majesty of the Ashcroft estate, most of the guests already in their beds after a hearty dinner and some entertainment in the drawing room. It was the time of night that Hugo liked the best at these house parties, when he and his closest friends were left alone to enjoy the peace, sharing the good port and brandy while everyone else slept.
The group of five—Hugo, Dominic, Frances, Laurence, and Joan—were gathered in the Orangery that still carried some of the warmth of the day. Fires flickered outside on the lawn, the doors open to let in the fragrant night air, the world entirely calm despite the chaos within Hugo’s mind.
“How was your walk today?” Joan asked, wrapped in a woolen blanket. “I meant to ask earlier.”
Frances nodded. “I did not hear you return.”
“It was… pleasant,” Hugo replied, a slight catch in his throat.
He had not mentioned the aftermath to anyone, as much for his own sake as for Evelyn’s. Laurence would have smacked him soundly if he learned that he had pulled Evelyn into his private study to speak to her alone. Indeed, Laurence would certainly have called Hugo a hypocrite, considering what had happened to Octavia two years ago.
“What walk was this?” Laurence asked, while Dominic seemed content to stay in silence, holding Frances to him, his chin resting on top of her head.
“Hugo walked with Miss Parsons this afternoon,” Joan replied with a fond smile at her husband. “I told you at dinner.”
Laurence pulled an apologetic face. “I confess, it slipped my mind. Is this the lady who will become the Duchess of Ravenvale, then?”
“Is it the same lady who won the auction?” Dominic asked, suddenly interested.
He, most of all, had been changed by marriage. There had been a time, not so very long ago, when no one would have believed it if Dominic had said he was considering marriage again. Then, Frances had appeared, knocking on his door to ask for the position as his daughter’s society tutor, and the impossible had become possible.
“It is, love,” Frances replied, as Hugo observed his friends and their wives, who had also become his friends.
They were the sole reason that he had decided to relent on the idea of matrimony, though he was not relenting fast enough for his mother’s liking. He, too, had assumed that he would either never marry or that it would be some years before he finally settled down. Then, he had seen how Joan and Frances had transformed his friends, softening them, improving them, making them so happy that it was impossible not to be envious.
