Five minutes later, I stand in front of his quarters, paralyzed with indecision. My hand hovers, wanting to knock, but also not. I feel too exposed under the fluorescent lights in the corridor.
What the hell am I doing?
Clarity slices into me like a bolt of lightning. What is wrong with me? He has a girl. Doesn’t matter if it’s not serious, or if Karra likes to step out. They’re still together and I have no right to be here.
Better to keep it simple. Friendship. The simplest thing of all.
Shaking my head to chastise myself, I turn to leave—just as the door swings open.
Gray’s eyes widen to find me there. “Hey.”
“Hi,” I blurt out. “Sorry. I don’t know why I’m—”
“I was just coming to find you,” he cuts in, his voice gruff.
I falter. “You were?”
Without a word, he steps back into his quarters and holds the door open for me.
I hesitate only for a moment before walking in. He shuts the door behind me, and the air suddenly feels thicker, making it hard to breathe.
I take in the sight of him. He’s in loose pants. A white T-shirt. His blond hair is messy, like he’s been running his hands through it.
“Can I start?” I say awkwardly.
He nods.
“I wanted to say I’m sorry about the way I spoke to Karra. It was out of line. I apologized to her again this morning.”
“Yeah, she told me.”
“But I also owe you an apology,” I say, looking anywhere but at him. My feet. The wall. A spot over his head. “I thought you were full of yourself when you accused me of being jealous.” I finally meet his eyes. “You weren’t being presumptuous. I was jealous.”
He looks like he’s trying not to laugh.
“I know I have no right to be jealous. It sort of snuck up on me, that I might…” I trail off.
“Might what?”
“That I might, ah, have feelings for you.”
He doesn’t say a word. I can’t read him at all, and it makes me nervous.
“But don’t worry,” I hastily add. “I’ll do my best to get over it.”
He raises a brow.
“I would never steal someone’s man. I don’t plan to steal you.”
He’s tryingreallyhard not to laugh now. “I appreciate that.”
“I promise. I’m not the kind of person who would ever do that. In fact, I shouldn’t have said a word about it. But I didn’t want you to think I was just being a quat to your girl for no rea—”
“She’s not my girl.”
I stop talking. “What?”
“I broke up with Karra tonight.”