From my mother.
From my father.
I swallow, but it sticks in my throat.
I was never good for her.Inever have been.
It’s about letting her go.
And not just because I have to—because I should.
I lean my forehead against the car, the cold metal grounding me. My hands curl into fists at my sides.
I could still go to her. Still ask her to stay.
She might even say yes.
And that’s the worst part of all.
Because if I asked, she’dgive upsomething for me. Not because she should. Not because it’s what’s best for her.
But because she cares.
And I can’t let her do that.
Not for me.
I push off the car, exhaling shakily.
For the first time since the call, the roaring in my head quiets.
I don’t start the engine. Don’t drive to her apartment.
I sink into the driver’s seat, gripping the steering wheel until my knuckles ache.
Let her choose,a voice whispers.Let her have this. Let her go.
26
TARA
As I’m humming along to my music, making a new playlist for myself a message pings across the top of my phone.
Space boy
I need you.
I open the chat
Please will you come to say goodbye? Gran is insisting she sees you before she goes. Family brunch at L’Étoile.
11am.
Of course, I’ll go. Even though his family came to my work to make fun of me. Even though Alfie got me fired from my job. Even though pretending makes my heart ache so bad because it doesn’t feel like pretending one little bit. I already let him down once, Ican’t do it again.
Sure
See you there
