And if an orc’s idea of taking care of a woman also involved tying her up, or punishing her, or cuddling her after he’d just plundered her arse, what did that matter? Why did Rosa care? She was here to learn, to spy, eighteen days…
“How will I know if I’m pregnant, from that time?” she made herself ask, her eyes blinking toward the stone wall. “Will Efterar be able to tell?”
“Ach,” came John’s quiet answer behind her. “But I shall also be able to smell our son upon you, when he comes.”
Our son. When he comes. As if he were already on his way. Aninevitability.
An unbidden quiver rippled up Rosa’s back, and John’s hand abruptly began moving again, sliding up and down her side with purposeful reassurance. “Do not fear, little rose,” he said, though his voice sounded oddly thick. “I shall keep you safe.”
And in this moment, with an orc’s body so close against hers, his hand smoothing so intent on her skin, it occurred to Rosa that — shebelievedhim. She trusted that he meant this. He would keep her safe. Gods, he’d even done so just now, hadn’t he? Ensuring she hadn’t injured herself, taking their pleasure this way, rather thanthatway. Even right now, just here, stroking her, soothing her, staying with her.
It was the kind of thing Lord Kaspar would never have done — his casual disregard of Rosa’s discomfort had always been total and absolute — and something seemed to be swelling in Rosa’s chest, kicking unsteadily at her heart. She trusted John. She —likedJohn. He was controlling, secretive, devious, dangerous — and curse her, shelikedhim. Anorc.
“I think you might have a twisted perception ofsafe, John-Ka,” she said, attempting to keep her voice light. “I mean, over just the past few days, I’ve been tied to a bed, andpunished, and impaled upon something that might better resemble alamp-post.”
John’s chuckle behind her was warmth, ease, solace. “Ach, and I ken you have yet never been so content as you are this night, foolish pet.”
He was right, damn him, and Rosa huffed out a breath that wasn’t quite offended. “And,” she continued, louder, as though he hadn’t spoken, “I was subjected to the appalling sight of your — your secret Ka-esh pleasure-den. Apleasure-den, John! Just down the hall from yourbedroom!”
The shake of John’s body behind her was longer, sustained, and his hand dropped down her front, to gently pinch at her damnably peaked nipple. “Squalling again, little pet,” he purred, his voice alight with mischief. “Do not play-act with me. I know you are curious of this. You mayhap even wish to go back to watch, and learn more. Ach?”
Watch. Learnmore. Another hard shiver chased down Rosa’s back, not even close to afraid this time, and John chuckled again as he scraped at her nipple with a single sharp claw. “I ken you do not like to admit this, pet,” he murmured. “You are ashamed of your hunger for such things. But why?”
Rosa swallowed, loud enough that he surely heard it. Why. And why did she want to say it, why did she want to tell this abominable orc, of all people…
“Because itisshameful,” she whispered. “To want to be used and overpowered. To want to be — afraid.”
John’s scoff behind her was hoarse, immediate. “Who says this?” he demanded. “This harms no one, pet. It does not harm me, it does not harm you. You werecontenttoday, to work for me, and be fully my pet. You are atpeace. I can taste this upon you. Even now.”
Rosa swallowed again, and she could feel his hand, again stroking up and down her side, sure, safe. “The only harm lies,” he said, quieter, “with thesemen. The men who have harmed you, to steal your gifts for their own. The men who havetaughtyou to be ashamed, so you shall keep their dark secrets safe.”
Rosa’s breath had gone still, the whole world shuddered still, but for that warm hand, caressing up and down her side. “There are orcs who do this also,” he continued, his voice a whisper. “There are orcs who did such to me. But I ought not to feel shame for the deeds of others. My deeds, and my wishes, are my own.”
Rosa’s brain shouted, rebelled — orcs had donewhatto him? — but then it stuttered, catching, finding something to cling to in the suddenly screeching chaos.
“But youareashamed sometimes, John,” she countered. “Of being an orc. Of doing things, or liking things, that make you an orc. As if orcs are all violent, aggressivemonsters.”
Now it was John swallowing, John’s silence, John’s hand gone still against her skin. And Rosa heard herself let out a laugh, bitter, broken, perhaps even angry, because it was so painful, and so gods-damnedfoolish—
“I knew that was bullshit before I evermetone of you,” she said, her voice rising, wavering. “And I know it so much more now. You orcs are so much more interesting, and unique, andalive, than I ever could have imagined. And you’re my favourite one, John, you’re so clever, you work so hard, you’re so committed and consistent and — andnoble. You should beproudof who you are.”
There was another choked stillness, broken not even by the sound of a breath — until behind her John shifted, raising himself up onto his elbow, tilting her head up so their eyes locked. Held. Spoke. No falsehoods.
“You’remarvellous, John,” Rosa whispered. “Any woman wouldloveto be your pet.”
There was more stillness, his black lashes blinking, his throat convulsing. “Ach, well,” he said, finally, his voice sounding less certain than Rosa had ever heard him. “It is luck, then, mayhap, thatyouhave gained this honour.”
Rosa elbowed back at him, watching the warmth spill across his eyes, feeling it spill deep inside her belly. “It is notluck,” she countered. “It’s the gods wreaking their cruel revenge on me, and giving me a lord who thinks I’m prattling, and bony, and astrumpet!”
But John’s laugh was almost unbearably gentle, and he lowered his mouth, kissed softly at her cheek. “Ach,” he breathed, “and yet, you are also a worthy pet for your lord, little rose. Just what an orc should wish for.”
The warmth shimmered deeper, brighter, flickering up Rosa’s spine, enveloping her heart. Just what an orc should wish for. Worthy.Worthy.
She couldn’t seem to stop smiling, suddenly, beaming delightedly up at his watching eyes, and a bright giggle escaped her lips. “You’re just saying sweet things, you reprobate,” she murmured, “so I’ll forget all about your secret pleasure-den.”
“Ach, no,” John said back, his mouth slyly curving up, all devious delicious danger. “I say such things so you shallrememberit, pet.”
Rosa ignored the immediate surge of heat in favour of sticking her tongue out at him — an action he returned with a teasing little snap of his teeth toward it, sending another full-body shiver deep into her bones.
