“You… swore you wished for this,” Simon’s voice continued, quiet again. “Ach?”
And was it an accusation, or was it mockery, or was it… uncertainty. Yes, yes, it was fuckinguncertainty, still, after Maria had done that, proven that to him, gone through this sheerhellto please him. She hadn’t shouted, she hadn’t wept or begged, she’d held her head high and kept the hysteria at bay and fuckinghonouredhim like he’d wanted, and nowthis?Again?!
The rage felt like a battering eruption, likerelief. Powerful enough to snap Maria’s gaze up, to where this hideous asshole was standing far too close, separated only by the safety of the fur, still clutched in her trembling, sparking fingers.
“Yes, you greatprick,” she croaked at him. “I’ve told you again and again, I am committed to this, and I will do it! I gave you my word, I swore to honour you, and Ihave! Even when you marched me straight into a sickening den ofdebaucheryfor the sole purpose of publiclymockingme as a cheap vulgartramp!”
Shut up,shut up, her distant brain was shouting, but it was too late, her own rage catching and kindling in Simon’s hard black eyes. In the straining fists clutched at his sides, in the deep, sneering laugh from his cruel mouth.
“If you truly wish tohonour,” he growled back, “you no falter and fuss at each command from my mouth. You no whine and wail when I only seek to claim you and keep you safe. You noreekof fury and fear when I flaunt you before my kin, as I again and again swore to you I would!”
What? The rage was a screaming white light, obliterating all else in its strength, and Maria’s bark of a laugh was loud, brittle, painful. “Oh, so now you’re not only judging my actions,” she spat at him, “but you’re condemning myfeelings, too?”
Simon’s eyes were glinting with black bitterness, his lips peeling back from his sharp teeth, a low growl scraping from his throat. “Silence, woman,” he hissed. “I no playaughtmore of your games. You swore to honour me!”
“Because I thought you would bereasonable!” Maria’s voice shouted, on its own, before she could possibly halt its escape. “I was beginning to think I waswrongabout you orcs, and perhaps you weren’t the vulgar barbarians you’re made out to be! Come to discover” — she hauled in air — “I’ve bound myself to a coarse, hideous, dim-wittedtyrantwho only wants to use and mock andhumiliateme!”
Shit,shit, what thehellwas she saying — but the words were out, they were truth, reverberating through this suddenly small-feeling room. And the way Simon was looking at her, it might have been the rage, or disbelief, or —hurt.
He shoved away from the bed, the movement unusually jerky, and lurched toward the mess of clothes in the corner. Grasping for something — a pair of trousers — and yanking them on with forceful hands. Keeping his back to her as he then snatched for what looked like a leather sword-belt, and wrapped it around his waist.
Maria briefly squeezed her eyes shut, opened her mouth to speak — but Simon had whirled around with astonishing speed, and somehow there was a scimitar in his hand.Thatscimitar. Huge, curved, gleaming, made to disembowel, to destroy…
“No more,” he snarled, his eyes snapping, his hand flexing on the sword’s hilt. “You honour me, or you go.Today. I play no games, woman.”
Maria’s throat badly convulsed, her cursed mouth opening again on its own. “Look, I didn’t —”
But his bark was far louder, his body lunging closer, that sword glinting so deadly in his fingers. “No,” he growled again. “I shall hear no more of this, woman. From henceforth, all I shall bear from your mouth is its tight, eager suckling upon my prick!”
And with those appalling words still ringing through the room, Simon spun and strode for the door. Leaving Maria, with that — thatthreathanging so brutal and heavy behind him. That utter —disregard, a cold cruel slap in the face, when she trulyhadsought to please him, to honour him. And why had she ever imagined that he’d wanted her, he didn’t want her to speak, to feel, to evenbe—
“You utterasshole,” she hissed at his broad back, her eyes blinking hard. “Ihateyou.”
Simon’s big body lurched to stillness in the doorway, his shoulders square and stiff. “This matters naught,” he said, his voice harsh, final. “You honour me, woman. Or you go.Today.”
12
After Simon left, the hysteria finally came.
It took Maria’s breath, leaving only strangled gasps and sobs. It took her heart, whipping it into a wild frenzy, thundering against her ribs. And it pooled to her limbs, quivering and trembling uncontrollably under the fur, shuddering and seizing against the bed.
And throughout, as always, it crept deep into her head. Screaming and mocking, pounding and aching, blurring and flickering white. Frigid. Barren. Difficult.It’s not my fault you don’t arouse me, I have no need of more children, I have no interest in bedding a madwoman. This is no mate, she is only woman I buy. All I shall bear from your mouth is its tight, eager suckling upon my prick…
It felt like hours of it, consuming Maria with suffocating power, flaying her raw in its wake. And when it finally, finally faded away, she found herself shivering, curled up, drenched in cold sweat. Her arms were scraped from her clutching fingernails, her head felt swollen and sore, and her eyes were scratchy, her mouth bone-dry.
“Gods damn it,” she croaked to the stone ceiling, as she forced her still-shivery body onto her back, scrubbing at her eyes. “Damnit.”
But at least she’d been alone. At least no one had been there to point, or mock, or judge. And now that it had passed, and Maria could somewhat feel herself again, there was also a chilly, detached emptiness. Resignation.Melancholia, her husband’s horrid physicians had called it.
But within the melancholia, Maria could still feel that same, settled certainty. The clarity. The choice.
She’d come to Orc Mountain. She’d signed a contract. She’d found an orc, and fucked him. She’d set all her plans into place, achieved all that she’d meant to do. And next…
Maria groaned and scrubbed at her face again, dragging in deep breaths. It didn’t matter what happened next. What Simon did next. She was here for her revenge, and her freedom, and that was all she cared about.
It had to be.
So she wiped at her wet eyes, and shoved herself up to sit on the side of the bed. She would do this. She would be silent, and stay where Simon had put her, and do all that he commanded. She would even keep wearing this blastedloincloth. In public.
