Simon snorted a laugh, and then spun on his heel and strode away. Hoisting Maria’s sticky body a little closer as he walked through the trees, deeper and deeper, until she heard the distinctive sound of rushing water. And when Simon settled her down again, it was on a small patch of grass, close beside the surge of a bubbling stream.
“Stay, my brave one,” he murmured, “whilst I care for you.”
With that, he yanked out a rag — what might have been the remnants of Maria’s tattered tunic — and dipped it in the water. And with careful, gentle strokes, he began wiping her clean. Starting with her face, smoothing carefully over her eyes, her cheeks, her mouth, before moving steadily, slowly downwards.
It still felt bizarrely unreal, in a day that had already been full of utter impossibilities, and Maria watched him with dazed, hazy eyes. Drinking up the tenderness in his touch, the faint tremble of his fingers on her skin. The way his head was bowed over her, his long hair still hanging loose, his eyes not quite meeting hers.
“So I take it,” Maria finally said, her voice slightly wavering, “you forgive me, then?”
Simon’s eyes blinked toward her, almost as if startled, so Maria drew in courage, and kept going. “For lying to you, and breaking our contract, and running away, like I did? And” — she grimaced — “not trusting you?”
Simon’s brow had furrowed, his head ducking again, and there was an odd stain of red, creeping up his neck. “Ach, I forgive you,” he said, quiet. “I can no fault you for what I also should have done, in your place. For whatanySkai should have done.”
Oh. Something fierce and warm flickered in Maria’s belly, and she watched Simon’s hand wipe at her shoulders, her collarbones. “I only raged at the truth of this, ach?” he continued, his gaze still not meeting hers. “I swore to keep you safe, and thus I could no even run away with you, no with Ulfarr so hungry to hunt you. I was thus bound to hunthim, to guard you, whilst you ran without me. Whilst you faced this cruel dukealone.”
Wait. Sothatwas why Simon hadn’t come with her, when she’d left? Not because of his work, or even his fight to the death — but because he’d needed to stay with Ulfarr? To keep Mariasafe?
“I raged at you, for my own failing,” he said, even quieter, his mouth twisting. “This was wrong, ach? It was only easier to rage, than to face the depths of my fear. To face this threat” — his huge shoulders rose, fell — “of losing you, for always.”
Oh. It felt like a confession, like an apology, like something he wasashamedof. And it didn’t make sense, suddenly because he’d said, he’dsaid—
“But when I left,” Maria whispered, “you said you didn’t care if I came back. That it didn’t —matter, to you.”
Simon’s eyes snapped up to hers, his brow furrowed deep. “You are Skai,” he said, his voice cracking. “Thus, you were free to make this choice. You arealwaysfree to make this choice. Even after I have fully claimed you thus.”
He waved a jerky hand toward her waist, toward the mess still spattered against it — and the understanding dipped and soared, hurtling across Maria’s thoughts. She was no longer his prisoner. She was no longer bound by a contract. She was Skai. She wasfree.
And Simon — Simon’s eyes had dropped again, and Maria could see the tension in his jaw, his shoulders, his still-wiping fingers on her skin. “Mayhap you yet wish for this freedom, ach?” he whispered, as though he’d once again read into her soul. “I have no shown myself a good mate to you, in this. I have raged at you. Confined you. Brought you pain.Wieldedyou, against my clan’s ways. Even today” — his throat convulsed — “I have done this, with my rut. With mywords.”
Right. Maria’s thoughts flicked backwards, to the way Simon had spoken, before all his watching kin. To all his forceful, powerful words. Changing his clan’s ways. Changing their future.
And he’d gained that, he’d accomplished that, he should be overjoyed by that — but in this moment, he looked almost regretful. Miserable.Defeated.
Something was wildly swerving in Maria’s chest, and her tingling hand clutched to his, pressing it tight against her skin. Needing him to look at her, suddenly, and thank the gods he did, those eyes so molten, so uncertain, soafraid.
“Simon,” she breathed, hoarse. “What you did today wasincredible. Not only did you keepmesafe, but you’ve also granted safety to all the Skai mates after me. And you refused to fight to the death, and showed a new way for Enforcers after you, too. And even before all that” — her fingers spasmed against his — “you taught me to keepmyselfsafe, Simon. You gave me confidence. Courage.Peace.”
Simon blinked at her, and then barked a sound that might have been a laugh. “You yet held all this, my brave one,” he whispered. “You only needed to find it again, ach? Since this first day we met, you have been so true. So brave. Sopure.”
Maria’s mouth choked a laugh too —purewas surely the last way she could describe herself, after having been ravaged and rutted by an orc, six times, inpublic— but Simon’s eyes had abruptly narrowed, his claws flexing against her skin.
“You are,” he insisted. “Youare. You spurned your husband, and ran alone across all the realm to me. You bravely met me, and swore to bear me a son, and honour me. And you have done all this, ach? Each day, amidst all I have cast upon you” — his other hand jabbed a finger toward her — “you have done this. You have sought to obey me, and learn from me, and become one of my kin. You sought tohelpme.”
His voice was fervent, and his eyes were just the same, glinting bright upon hers. “I meant to Enforce you, and cleanse you,” he said. “But in this, you cleansedme. With your peace, you gavemethis peace also.”
Oh. Maria’s throat felt thick, her eyes prickling, and her free hand numbly, instinctively reached out, and found the furious beat of his heart. Spreading wide over it, knowing it,hers.
“And today,” Simon continued, his jaw grinding in his cheek. “You defeated this duke. You defeated Ulfarr. And next, you welcome my rut, before all my kin, when I have no evenspokenof this to you? You watched me, and you learnt me, and you met me, and honoured me, and —”
His voice caught, his head shaking, his finger again jabbing toward her. “I sent you away from meweeping,” he hissed. “I tasted the vastness of your grief, even as you granted me our son’s ownname. And yet, today you do this? You welcome me thus? You beg for me and my seed, and flaunt your joy in this? You alterallfor me, and my clan? You gain us ourfreedom, to choose our mates as we wish? To gain ourfuture?”
Maria couldn’t stop blinking at him, at the way his glittering eyes held hers, vehement, relentless. “You are so pure, my brave one,” he whispered. “You are all I have everdreamtof.”
Oh. Something was bubbling in Maria’s chest, raw and desperate, and she grabbed at him, dragging his huge form close, burying her face in his fragrant neck. “Butyou, Simon,” she gasped, squeezing her eyes shut, inhaling deep. “Youdidcleanse me. Yousawme. You made me a Skai, made me your mate. And youdestroyedUlfarr, and kept me safe, just as you swore you would. As I should have known you would. I should havetrustedyou with that.”
Simon’s arms had circled tighter around her, and there was a hoarse chuckle, vibrating through his chest. “Ach, but this way, I witnessed my sweet mate near slice off my foe’s prick,” he murmured back. “You can nofathomthe pure joy this sight brought me, my pretty one.”
Maria laughed too, muffled against his neck, but she could feel a trace of sharp claws, skittering on her still-sticky skin. “I may yet still kill Ulfarr, you ken,” he said, quieter. “Just as we may yet kill this duke, should he betray us. But I wish to yet try these new ways, ach?”
