I swear I hear him say, “Adorable,” but I’m asleep before it can pierce my brain.
“Wake up, baby.” The soft whisper makes my eyes blink open, and I find Conan leaning above me. “You’re home.”
I rub at my eyes as I glance around, realizing we are outside my apartment building. Glancing at the clock, I see an hour has passed.
“You were sleeping pretty heavily, so I did a few laps. You looked like you needed it,” he admits.
“Oh, thanks,” I murmur, feeling a little embarrassed. I hesitate for a moment, playing with my seat belt as I look from him to the building, unsure what to say.
“I had an amazing night. Thank you for letting me keep you company,” he says, “and thank you for being my first date in a long, long time.”
“I had an amazing night too.” I really enjoyed our date. I wasn’t sure how I would feel because my feelings for Noah are still there, and maybe it isn’t fair to Conan. He’s such a nice guy, but if this is how I can get over Noah, then so be it.
“I’ll pick you up in the morning. What time?” he whispers softly.
“Uh, is seven okay?” I ask awkwardly.
“Sure, I have a shoot anyway, so I need to be at work early. See you then.” He smiles and undoes my belt for me. Clutching my teddy and bag, I climb out.
“See you in the morning,” I tell him.
“Text me when you get inside,” he orders, and I nod. At the door to the building, I glance back to see he’s still watching, so I wave.
Once I’m inside the elevator, I slump into the wall, placing my hand over my racing heart as I wonder what the hell it means.
Can you like more than one person?
Am I getting over Noah, or is Conan replacing him?
I have no idea, and it makes me more confused than ever, but when I think of tonight, I feel warm all over.
Conan is a bright, sunny day, while Noah is a cool winter night. Both are equally beautiful, and I’m drawn to both.
Groaning, I lift the teddy and pout. “We are in trouble,” I tell it.
ELEVEN
The bag swings harder under my brutal kicks and punches. I unleash my anger on the inanimate object until I lean against it, panting and covered in sweat.
Music pumps through my basement gym, filling the silence I have come to hate. All I’m left with are thoughts and memories. He ruined my comfortable silence for me. Yet again, my thoughts turn to Mackie and what he’s doing right now, so despite my exhaustion, I attack the bag again until I can’t feel my body, hoping it will clear my mind, but even when I collapse onto the mat, my brain won’t stop.
He went on that date. I saw him get picked up. I wasn’t spying. I just happened to see it. He went out with that stiff photographer. He’s dating someone.
That’s good because he’ll leave me alone, right? The thought makes me want to take a bat and smash his date’s perfect fucking car. I wonder what they are doing. I think he said furniture shopping. Will they eat together?
Will he take Mackie home?
Will they kiss?
My heart stops, and I close my eyes as I cover my face. It’s none ofmy business if they kiss or hook up. Mackie is single and young. He can do whatever he wants.
I still want to break something.
The thought of anyone kissing him makes me want to rip up the entire house and burn it down.
Dropping my arm, I stare up at my ceiling, sliding my hand down until my fingers linger over my lips as I remember the way his kiss felt.
He thinks I forgot, which is for the best, but it’s all I think about. I was weak for one moment and couldn’t resist.
