Outside, Nick reached his bike, the walk from the elevator not registering at all. He was too caught up in his thoughts. Even when he sat on his bike, time seemed to still and Nick just sat there, eyes seeing nothing before him because his mind was playing over too many memories full of Reece. Thoughts of theirfuture and how unbearably bleak it looked. Nick didn’t know what to think. What to do.
And before he could figure it out, his phone rang. It was Donovan, his agent. He answered despite his mind having no chance of focusing, and he’d been as unprepared for the news delivered to him on that phone call as he was Reece saying those three forbidden words.
The draft was only one month away, and it was time for him to be making his moves.
29
Chapter 29 - Reece
It didn’t hit him until he was sitting on the edge of the hotel’s indoor pool, his feet dangling in the water. Reece told Nick that he loved him. It just slipped right out. Nick didn’t have a chance to respond, and Reece wasn’t sure if that was a good thing or not. He tried not to overthink it, but he couldn’t help worrying.
Maybe he’d gotten too comfortable. But then… maybe not. Nick was so sweet on him. He claimed Reece was his and his alone. He kissed him and took him on dates and let him all but move in with him.
They were basically boyfriends anyways.
And, really, Reece had always loved him. Was it too hard to believe that Nick could love him too? After everything? No, Reece believed in his heart that Nick really cared for him, too. If he didn’t love him yet, maybe one day he could. And, if nothing else, as long as nothing changed, he was sure Nick would accept those words for what they were.
The same simple truth that had always been just what it was. A fact Reece could deny with his words but never his true feelings.
His overthinking was a mess, but it helped him come up with a plan on the off chance that those words scared Nick. Reece would reassure him like always. And distract him.
It wasn’t easy, but with a little pleading and promising the photographer a favor, Reece ended his day with some raw shots from the day. He blushed a little thinking of showing Nick him posing like that. No shirt. Buttoned shirt completely open. A blue silk robe. Him on the floor at the end of the bed, bare feet planted on the plush carpet, legs spread to show the intricate details of the patterned silk piece. The swimsuit shots somehow appeared more innocent, but even those made him feel shy.
Nick wanted to see though, so Reece would show him proudly, even if he was bashful about it.
It was quiet when he let himself into Nick’s. Dark for the early evening. And Reece was a bit later than usual, so the fact that he didn’t smell dinner in the works when he walked in was immediately concerning. He took off his shoes, willing his heart to calm as he walked in. Reece set the folder with the pictures on the coffee table and walked into the kitchen like he did every day.
Kent wasn’t there, no food in sight, but Nick was. Alone, leaning against the counter with his arms crossed.
The look on his face was so tight that Reece’s heart twisted at the sight of it. And he was afraid. But he took a breath, telling himself that he was worrying for nothing because that was his Nick and just a few hours ago they’d been having sushi and kissing and—
“Is Kenny okay?” he asked, voice so quiet that if his nerves weren’t shot he might’ve been embarrassed.
“I gave him the night off so we can talk.”
Oh God.Just that fast. Just that easily, Reece was about to lose everything that meant anything to him. He was going to lose Nick just because he got ahead of himself. He voiced his feelings unthinkingly, and now Nick was going to break up with him.
“Nicky, please, if it’s about what I said, I didn’t mean it—I mean I did mean it but—b-but it doesn’t change anything, I prom—”
“I’m up for the draft next month,” he said, cutting Reece off, expression still hard. Even his voice was cold.
But that news was so good, so amazing that Reece forgot everything else for a moment. He didn’t dare fling himself at Nick to embrace him like he wanted to, he just clasped his hands instead, and smiled like his heart wasn’t unbearably fragile at the moment.
“I’m so proud of you, Nicky! I knew they’d call. Oh my God! Next month is so soon! So fast! Oh, this is exciting! Everything you worked so hard for—”
“Reece.” His name might as well have been a knife to his heart. “That means this—us—we can’t fuck around anymore.”
Reece couldn’t breathe. He had to be dreaming. He had to have fallen asleep at work and gotten sucked into some nightmare he desperately needed to wake up from.
“No… That’s not… I mean—Why can’t we? Y-you’re overthinking it.”
“I’ll be moving soon.”
“I’ll follow you. I’ll go wherever you go, Nicky. It’s okay, things can still be the same. You don’t have to leave me.”
The last words were near silent, a plea he didn’t have the strength not to utter.
It hurt. He was hurting so much, chest aching. He couldn’t breathe, panic starting to settle in as he recognized the finality in Nick’s eyes.
