Way ahead of you, Ryan.I smile as I bring another handful of popcorn to my mouth.
Ryan
I don’t know why I’m doing this. I’m still far too riled up after everything with my sister, and I’m likely to blurt out things I shouldn’t if I don’t find a way to fully settle down. But just talking to Brandon was enough to stop me from spiraling completely. Maybe being around him can settle me. In my anticipation for his company, I’m taking steps two at a time to Danton’s front door.
His dog, Moxy, an aging St. Bernard who was old when I lived here six years ago, is barking her deep, low bark before I manage to press the doorbell.
“Who’s there, Moxy?” I can hear Vicky asking on the other side of the door in the extra-excitable voice she uses almost exclusively for her beloved dog.
Moxy lets out another deep woof right as Vicky opens the door.
“Ryan!” she exclaims as she holds the door open with one hand while her other is wrapped around Moxy’s collar, keeping her fromblocking my way through the door. She moves them both out of the way so I can enter. Once inside, I remove my shoes.
“It’s so good to see you without a piece of plexiglass between us,” she says. “Who are you here to see? Danton’s out back with the three older ones kicking a ball around and Brandon’s on the couch with Danny.”
I pat Moxy on the head between her ears while she gives me a thorough sniffing all over. “Brandon and Danny, please,” I say as I let out a yawn, then a sigh of relief. Just walking through this door allows my adrenaline to crash. “I think they’re a little more my speed today.”
“Danton would agree with you.” She laughs and starts walking out of the foyer towards the kitchen and great room at the back of the house. She gestures for me to follow her. “He and Brandon were both dead on their feet when they got home last night. And then again today after practice. But you know my kids, they never let anyone rest.”
“Except for Danny,” I say as we enter the open-concept living space. From where I stand at the edge of the kitchen area, I can see Brandon on the couch with Danny leaning against him, asleep.
He waves at me, then points at the sleeping kid glued to his side. On his face, he’s wearing a welcoming and endearing smile.
“Danny has his moments too,” Vicky says, coming to my side. On a napkin in her hand, she holds a cookie out for me. “It’s just that Brandon found his cheat code.”
I look at the cookie and my mouth begins to water. Vicky’s cookies are unlike any other I’ve ever eaten. And if this is one of her brown butter chocolate chips, it was more than worth the drive over. “Is that…?”
“Brown butter chocolate chip.” She winks. “I’ll put a tin aside for you before the scavengers come in and eat them all.” She gestures towards where Brandon and Danny are lounging. “Make yourself at home.”
“Thanks,” I say, biting into my cookie. With Moxy right on my heels, I make my way into the great room. The closing credits ofthe Lego movie are rolling already. Happy to simply be here, soaking up the things I loved when it was me that was the rookie, I sit on the floor and let Moxy rest her head on my lap.
“I can make room for you up here if you’d like,” Brandon says behind me.
I look over my shoulder at him. His hair is a mess, and I want nothing more than to reach up and fix it. But that is quite possibly the worst thing I can do right now. I’m terrified that if I touch him, I’ll boot Danny from his place and curl myself around Brandon’s side for some much-needed comfort. It’s best if I stay down here with the dog.
He narrows his eyes at me. “You good?”
“Yeah,” I say and nod my head yes. Maybe doubling up will help to convince me.
“You sure?” he asks again, looking at me like he knows I’m full of shit.
“I’m sure,” I say, taking a deep breath.
And I really am okay. Everything about this moment has my nervous system quieting down. I turn back around and grab the remote from the table to press restart when given the option to begin the movie again. As I do this, I feel Brandon thread his fingers through my hair. He says nothing as he begins to gently message my scalp, and I relax into his touch.
SIXTEEN
GREEN BAY, WISCONSIN—EIGHT YEARS AGO
Brandon
“Mom!” I yell from the back door of the house. I glance at the kitchen clock; it says four fifty. Ryan and Ander’s game starts in ten minutes. I should have gone with Dad when he took them to the rink an hour ago. “We’re gonna be late!”
She doesn’t answer me. So I try again. “Mom!”
Still nothing, but I can hear her voice talking to someone on her phone in my parents’ bedroom. Huffing, I leave my post at the door and walk down the hall to get her. She can carry on this conversation in the car.
“We’re planning on going down to Chicago to watch the boys play.” My mom’s voice stops me in my tracks.
